might as well


We KNEW it. We always felt, deep in our hearts, that disgraced former national security adviser Michael Flynn's foreign agent work for Turkey seemed like a bit of a non sequitur, taken by itself. It was like, "All these numbskulls have these weird Russian ties, and Michael Flynn has his own weird Russian ties too, but what's that rapscallion doing over there in Turkey? Did he take a wrong turn on his way to Russia?" Turns out: yes!

Politico is out with a report about how Ekim Alptekin, the Turkish business guy Flynn was working for on behalf of the Islamist regime of Turkish president Recep Tayyip Erdoğan (a regime that is now bigger, stronger and even more uncut after the nation's recent referendum), is ALSO swimming in a giant vat of Russian dressing:

The Turkish man who gave Mike Flynn a $600,000 lobbying deal just before President Donald Trump picked him to be national security adviser has business ties to Russia, including a 2009 aviation financing deal negotiated with Vladimir Putin, according to court records.

The man, Ekim Alptekin, has in recent years helped to coordinate Turkish lobbying in Washington with Dmitri “David” Zaikin, a Soviet-born former executive in Russian energy and mining companies who also has had dealings with Putin’s government, according to three people with direct knowledge of the activities.

Politico reminds us Flynn was already working on the Trump campaign when Alptekin hired him, and also that the FBI was already investigating Russian meddling in our election at that time, so it's not like he can be like "Didn't we ALL do silly things with the Russian and Turkish governments when we were young and fancy free?" (No, we didn't.)

This part just makes us laugh:

Flynn’s lawyer, Robert Kelner, declined to comment. In a filing with the Justice Department, Flynn said he relied on assurances from Alptekin that he was not directly or indirectly funded by a foreign government.

Eh, how you say in U.S. American? WINK WINK! NUDGE NUDGE!

As to the Turkish Alptekin dude's ties with the Russian Zaikin dude, Alptekin is like, "Girl I don't know her." But Politico reports that Alptekin has ties with leaders of an American-based group called the Turkish Heritage Foundation, for people with Turkish heritage, which was set up by ... the Russian Zaikin dude, who is totally not Turkish. Politico's sources say Alptekin and Zaikin totally know each other, and also PFFFFFT.

Read Politico's whole report to learn about the extensive Russian business dealings (some of which are OIL BUSINESS dealings!) of both Alptekin and Zaikin.

Flynn has insisted that the only stuff he was doing for Turkey dude had to do with trying to get the American government to give Turkish cleric Fethullah Gulen, who lives in America, back to the Turkish government, because Erdoğan blames Gulen for an attempted coup on his regime. You'll remember that former CIA director James Woolsey suddenly remembered recently that he witnessed a meeting where Flynn was talking about KIDNAPPING Gulen and Fed-exing him to Turkey, outside U.S. extradition law. So that's ... highly illegal and shit.

(Then there was the wholly different matter of Rudy Giuliani having secret meetings with Turkey promising to try to free a Turkish man who'd been prosecuted by Preet Bharara, the US attorney Donald Trump later fired! It's all complicated and shit, but we're sure Rachel Maddow will get out her Glenn Beck white board and 'splain us all of it tonight on her show.)

Oh and then there were all those shady meetings Flynn had with the Russian ambassador and then lied about, regarding lifting U.S. sanctions on Russia imposed by President Barack Obama as punishment for Russian meddling in the 2016 election.

Speaking of illegal and shady, you'll remember that Flynn was one of the first to come forward to the congressional intelligence committees and the FBI saying he wants immunity, but the House Intelligence Committee was like "huh?" and the Senate Intelligence Committee (which is doing nothing right now) is also not interested in doling out Get Out Of Jail Free cards (either because fuck Michael Flynn, or because that's part of "doing nothing").

We don't know exactly how many illegal things Michael Flynn has done, but we are guessing the answer is ALL OF THEM KATIE and also GO TO JAIL. Does he get to be the first to go to jail?

Chop chop, James Comey, we're getting antsy out here.

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[Politico]

Evan Hurst

Evan Hurst is the senior editor of Wonkette, which means he is the boss of you, unless you are Rebecca, who is boss of him. His dog Lula is judging you right now.

Follow him on Twitter RIGHT HERE.

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