Michele Bachmann Thinks Liberals' January 6 ‘Theatrical Event’ Much Better Than ‘Cats’
Former House Rep. Michele Bachmann is a religious zealot who's also a big fan of Donald Trump, a guy who is all seven deadly sins with a few bonus tracks. It doesn't make any sense, but Bachmann herself is rarely rational. Like most of Trump's supporters, she believes the past election was stolen from the mad MAGA king, and we now have a “fake president."
On January 6, people who were similarly disconnected from reality stormed the Capitol and tried to stop the electoral vote certification. Bachmann believes that was also fake. Her mind is lost in Strawberry Fields.
Bachmann, who is now dean of Regent University's Robertson School of Government and also the END TIMES, was a guest Sunday on Jan Markell's radio show "Understanding the Times," and those times are the END TIMES. The intro features an "Outer Limits"-style narrator declaring, “When up is down, black is white, and evil is good, it must be the last days!" Bachmann offered her perfectly sane and rational opinion about what actually happened on January 6.
BACHMANN: January 6, we're all told that that's the worst day that ever happened, these were the worst riots in America. It absolutely wasn't.
MAGA mob apologists insist that last summer's riots in Portland, Seattle, Minneapolis, and Kenosha, Wisconsin, were objectively worse than a literal attack on the US Capitol that required Congress members to evacuate. Bachmann's not even sure January 6 was a riot at all.
BACHMANN: It is my opinion that this was a theatrical event that the progressive Left put on.
In case you're like the Republicans whose short-term memories are worse than the guy's from Memento, here's a Tony Award's clip from what Bachmann calls a “theatrical event"
If this was a “theatrical event," it wasn't very good, and I've seen a lot of bad theatre. My wife and I attended a performance of Othello with Phillip Seymour Hoffman (not as Othello, but that would've been more interesting) where half the audience left at intermission. There was no intermission during the Capitol siege but people were leaving mid-performance. I usually consider that disrespectful to the actors, but these goons had pepper spray and flagpoles they used as clubs. Method acting is often self-indulgent but this crossed the line. The gallows set piece they constructed during the show was impressive but didn't encourage audience participation. No wonder the attack closed after a single performance.
BACHMANN: The individuals who were the instigators, who brought this about, these were agitators brought in to create this problem. I believe it was specifically done to rebrand Donald Trump as being an insurrectionist and a leader of a terrorist movement.
The Capitol siege was apparently liberals' Springtime for Trump, which made a fool of her dear leader. (He didn't need our help!) She has no proof for her slander, just her conviction that Trump is noble and pure, not at all the type of person who'd incite a mob to attack his political enemies, including his own vice president. Which he did.
It's pretty straightforward denial: If Trump did what he obviously did, then he's an insurrectionist and the leader of a terrorist movement. She doesn't like those results so she rolls the pair of dice in her head and concludes instead that evil liberals faked the whole thing. It's our sequel to the moon landing.
BACHMANN: I also believe that this was done to rebrand the Make America Great agenda, those of us who supported Donald Trump and that agenda, as evil and terrorists. That's all a lie.
In the last five months, you wouldn't even know that Donald J. Trump was ever the president. You wouldn't even know that those four years of his presidency existed.
If only that were true, but President Lost Cause won't go away, and the GOP is still fiercely devoted to him. He's not spending his time painting or watching football games with Ellen DeGeneres. He's still the demented face of the Republican Party.
BACHMANN: George Orwell wrote a book, “1984."
Republicans insist on invoking the author George Orwell, who said, "Every line of serious work that I have written since 1936 has been written, directly or indirectly, against totalitarianism and for democratic Socialism, as I understand it."
BACHMANN: He talked about a concept called the memory hole; if the government in charge didn't want you to remember someone, they put them in the memory hole. Donald J. Trump has been put in a memory hole. Make America Great Again has been put in a memory hole
Republicans are claiming that the attack on the Capitol was really improvisational tourism. Bachmann herself is claiming it was all make believe, a false flag operation, despite the arrests of 494 people (no theatre company can afford a cast that large). The insurrectionists were all openly Trump supporters with a clear history of rightwing political views. Republicans, including Bachmann, are attempting to stuff January 6 into a memory hole, but they're only ensuring an encore performance.
Follow Stephen Robinson on Twitter.
Keep Wonkette going forever, please, if you are able!
Stephen Robinson is a writer and social kibbitzer based in Portland, Oregon. He writes make believe for Cafe Nordo, an immersive theatre space in Seattle. Once, he wrote a novel called “Mahogany Slade,” which you should read or at least buy. He's also on the board of the Portland Playhouse theatre. His son describes him as a “play typer guy."