Michigan Militia Will Pump Whatever's Responsible For Flint's Poisoned Water Full Of Lead
Something something Liberty, something something Constitution
Residents of Flint, Michigan, can relax and stop worrying about the lead in their water, because for some reason a local militia group showed up at Flint City Hall Sunday with a trailer full of bottled water and a bunch of guns. That ought to fix things right quick! Roughly thirty guys in camouflage played at being all military (they even stood at attention for several minutes!) while "executive officer" Matthew Krol gave a speech about freedom and liberty and not letting the government get out of control. Why exactly the poisoning of the city's water supply is something a bunch of doofuses with guns think they have the skill set to resolve is beyond us. A cynical person might almost think that it was all a stunt to get the name of the "Genesee County Volunteer Militia" in the media. Well, there it is. Mission Accomplished.
In case you have a spare half hour that you'd like to squander some perfectly good brain cells on, local station WEYI captured the entire spectacle on video; we were impressed by the guys' military bearing and all the camo:
Krol explained why roughly 30 members of the militia had come to stand in front of some cameras:
“We’re here to defend this community," said Matthew Krol, the militia's executive officer, addressing the crowd in a full camouflage outfit with a handgun strapped to his hip. “We’re not going to allow (the government) to step on the people of Flint any longer.”
He added: “If it means having to take up arms in defense ... we will do that as well.”
Krol offered no particular targets for a potential armed defense of Flint's citizenry, although we suppose he'd be willing to shoot some water pipes, the Flint River itself, or perhaps a government regulator. He did seem pretty jazzed about the opportunity to fulminate about "tyranny" for a while:
There's government that's gone amok all acrossed [sic] our country: city, county, state, and federal, and people are getting angered over the whole thing. People are joining militias, people are joining Three Percenters, people are joining Oath Keepers...because people are getting fed up with what's going on in our country. We're losing our Constitution! Daily they're taking away some of our liberties! ... We're here in defense of this community, to say "Enough is enough," that we're not going to allow the government, be it the small local government or the big government, to step on the people of Flint longer.
In a particularly moving rhetorical flourish, he added, "Someone needs to be held accountable. Not just someone but some-body, all the way from the bottom person all the way up!" He also explained that the group's purpose was to educate the citizenry on the U.S. Constitution, and said judicial opinions held no authority over the Constitution itself. Somehow, that set Krol off on a tangent about the brave fellow wannabe-revolutionaries fighting tyranny in Oregon; it wasn't clear how he thought that was connected to the situation in Flint, but by God, it was definitely about government overreach and tyranny, not to mention trampling on the Bill of Rights. Krol stopped short of calling for cattle to be allowed to graze for free in Flint. Still, he's got a pretty impressive patch on his sleeve, which fairly screams Freedom:
[contextly_sidebar id="r0P3dXb0YxzkzygFN8Ovc0chGZ69PYXV"]At one point, a member of the crowd shouted out a clear reference to who's ultimately responsible: "Let's go play golf!" Damn that Obama and his meddling with Flint's water!
Militia member Dave McKellar made clear that the small turnout (and nearly complete absence of any Flint residents other than the media) was not an indication that the Genesee County Militia was lacking in support, claiming that he'd directed at least fifty members of the group to forego the demonstration so they could be out delivering clean water and filters to Flint residents. He also rejected the notion that Flint's water crisis was in any way related to the city's racial composition, because while government is always the enemy, it's apparently going too far to suggest that a state government might be more likely to ignore lead contamination in a city with a 60% black population than in, let's say, Bloomfield Hills, where the per capita income is $104K annually. Instead, McKellar insisted, the Flint water crisis is
a travesty of so many justices that it's unreal ... This is about broken trust. We trusted them to give our voice credence, to step forward and to speak for us and this is what we got for it. This isn't about a color issue. The only color involved is green.
Gosh, that almost sounds like he's against big money or something. Let's hope the other militia dudes don't find out there's a potential commie in their midst.
[contextly_sidebar id="XDMQluDWWDCcR48HnafcglvVAlpG9nfJ"]Speaking of commies, just in case you missed MSNBC's town hall on Flint, "American Disaster: Flint Water Crisis," hosted by Rachel Maddow, which ran Wednesday, you can view the whole thing online here. Guests included Flint Mayor Karen Weaver, Dr. Mona Hanna-Attisha, the local pediatrician who first called attention to elevated lead levels in Flint children, and Virginia Tech professor Marc Edwards, whose warnings about lead in Flint's water were largely brushed off by state officials. Here's an opening segment:
Gov. Rick Snyder was invited, but never confirmed whether he'd attend (spoiler alert: he didn't). The militia, astonishingly enough, didn't show up either, possibly because MSNBC refused to provide dildos.
Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.