Mitt Romney: A Folksy Throwback To Mormon Millionaires of the 1950s

Let's finally end racism and elect a president with GIANT FUCKING HANDS - WonketteOrange-skinned tycoon Mitt Romney isn't just an incredibly rich executive trying to buy what few others want (the 2008 GOP nomination), he's also a weirdo who speaks in some kind of bizarre Mayberry RFD language that only his 72 sons can understand. Here are some examples, and what they might really mean:

* "Gosh." (Origin obscure; likely refers to "Goshen," a mythical bible land between Las Vegas and Boulder.)

* "Boy, we've got the whole gopher village up here." (This might be a sex thing?)

* "This is so much fun." (Counting money.)

* "Whoop-de-doo!" (Definitely a sex thing.)

* "Gosh, I love America." (He doesn't want you to know his dad is Mexican.)

* "Holy Moly." (Reference to the Mormon god, "Moly.")

* "I do love chocolate malts!" (Something about Fred Thompson's colorful and wide-ranging sex life.)

* "Oh, grunt." (See above.)

Life With Romney -- Gee Whiz Rules [Boston Globe]


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