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Mitt Romney Considers First Ever Global War Tour!

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Whatta wegot in the local clip 'n' save today? "Mitt Romney’s campaign is considering a major foreign policy offensive at the end of the month that would take him to five countries over three continents..." HMMMMM. You have to wait until you *win* the presidential election to launch world war, dingus. And then it's perfectly acceptable. But maybe the rules are different for Republicans. What nations shall Mitt Romney delight with his arsenal of good humor, competitive sport, and decline?


The tour starts in the rogue state of England, where Mitt Romney will challenge the war-torn autocracy to begin the long march towards democratic reform. (And perhaps secure a handsie from the queen? He'll settle for Prince Charles, if necessary.)

The presumptive GOP nominee then is slated to travel to London for the start of the Olympics and to give a speech in Great Britain on U.S. foreign policy.

Next he would meet with our other Greatest Ally of All Time, Israel, and maybe even throw in a handshake with the leader of Israel's own Mexican-y Others.

Romney next would fly to Israel for a series of meetings and appearances with key Israeli and Palestinian officials.

Then a quick stop in the heart of Nazi Germany and hey, don't forget about Poland:

Then, under the plan being considered, he would return to Europe for a stop in Germany and a public address in Poland, a steadfast American ally during the Bush years and a country that shares Romney’s wariness toward Russia.

Stay away from those bullets, though:

Romney officials had considered a stop in Afghanistan on the journey, but that’s now unlikely.

Your Wonkette hopes he goes through with this. A Mitt Romney Global Tour would be comedy gold! "Hello, little Arab boy, have a Werther's candy -- but don't tell your mother" etc etc.

[Politico]

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Roger Stone, you got some 'splainin' to do, Mister! Remember all those times Stone swore on his Nixon tattoo that he never had any contact with Russians, wasn't a campaign surrogate, and wasn't tipped off to stolen DNC emails in advance? Like that time he told the Washington Post:

"I've never been to Russia. I didn't talk to anybody who was identifiably Russian during the two-year run-up to this campaign," he said. "I very definitely can't think of anybody who might have been a Russian without my knowledge. It's a canard."

Stone told the House Intelligence Committee the same thing last September, but, LOL FUNNY STORY! Seems that Stone just plum forgot about that time in May, 2016 when Trump communications advisor Michael Caputo asked him to meet with Henry Greenberg, "a man with a Make America Great Again hat and a viscous Russian accent." The Washington Post reports, Greenberg was offering sexxxxy Russian dirts on Hillary Clinton, which Stone and Caputo were only too happy to grab by the pussy. But they just couldn't get there!

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Congressman Beto O'Rourke, who hopes to replace Ted Cruz in the US Senate this fall, is one of several Texas and El Paso leaders participating in a march to the just-opened tent city at the US/Mexico border in Tornillo, Texas, where children have already been imprisoned "placed."

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