Donate
My mom and me

My mother is calling me on the phone from Oklahoma. She is screaming, and crying. She's sobbing. She needs me to be her mother right now, because her mother never was.

Adolph (yes, his real name) married my grandmother when my mom was 10, after her first dad died of chicken pox. Adolph's ex-wife had told my grandma Adolph attacked little girls. My grandmother married him anyway. I have always known this; my mother never kept it secret. But she needs to say it out loud, again. My mother, who is 75 years old, is wailing for someone to protect her.


Adolph would maul my mother's breasts from the time she was 10. He molested her for nine years, until she married and got the fuck out of dodge. Once, when she was little, he came into her room and lay on top of her. She screamed. "HE WOULD HAVE FUCKED ME IF I WAS OLDER," she yelled at me, just now. Adolph told my grandma my mother had unzipped his pants. He told her little brothers my mom molested them.

And my grandmother always knew. Oh Donna, she would say when my mother flipped her shit, why do you always cause trouble?

Adolph molested my mother and beat the shit out of all of them. My grandmother would pray to Mary and Jesus every day for Adolph's death; she wrote her prayers on little scraps of paper and kept them in her sewing kit, from which she made rag dolls for children all over the country. I have the sewing kit now, with an illustration of the Blessed Virgin on the lid, and its prayers for Adolph's death inside.

Grandma would pray for deliverance, but she never protected her children. "I'm just a wet noodle," she would say, over and over again, waiting for someone else to save them.

And here we are, and my mother is screaming about Susan Collins, all curses and unintelligible, guttural cries, barely able to come out. Susan Collins knows. She knows. SHE FUCKING KNOWS. And she's letting it happen just as surely as my sweet grandmother did. She's complicit, just like my grandmother was complicit, leaving them together in the room. Oh Donna, why do you always cause trouble.

My mother is crying. "YOU WOULD NEVER LET THAT HAPPEN TO DONNA ROSE," she is sobbing. No. I never, never, never, never, never, never would. She is apologizing, for "laying this" on me. She is telling me that she couldn't let a man touch her breasts until she was in her 40s. She is telling me about her beloved mother's betrayal. But I've always known, and all I can say is "yes."

Susan Collins, there's an old woman in Oklahoma right now sobbing like a tiny girl, and she wanted me to write this. She wants you to know a lot of things, mostly your name combined with ugly curses. She wants you to know she watched every word of your "disgusting" speech. She wants you to know you have betrayed her, and millions upon millions of tiny girls and old women and all of us in between. She wants you to know what you have done. Out of all of them, you were the one who claimed to be better. She wants you to know you are loathed.

It's a week. If you're able, will you keep us going?

How often would you like to donate?

Select an amount (USD)

Rebecca Schoenkopf

Rebecca Schoenkopf is the owner, publisher, and editrix of Wonkette. She is a nice lady, SHUT UP YUH HUH. She is very tired with this fucking nonsense all of the time, and it would be terrific if you sent money to keep this bitch afloat. She is on maternity leave until 2033.

$
Donate with CC

Arkansas Republican Senator and evil Pinocchio turned into a real live boy Tom Cotton appeared on CBS's "Face the Nation" to discuss the attacks on oil tankers on the Gulf of Oman. And while the world is still trying to confirm IF Iran perpetrated the attacks due to conflicting accounts (the US says it was Iran with mines; the Japanese shipping operator says it was a “flying object"), that hasn't stopped GOP politicians like Cotton from trying to turn this into the justification they've been looking for, for great good glorious WAR.

MARGARET BRENNAN: You have long been defined as a hawk on Iran. You see these recent attacks, these are commercial vessels not military installations. What kind of response is warranted?

COTTON
: Well Iran for 40 years has engaged in this kind of attacks going back to the 1980s. In fact Ronald Reagan had to reflag a lot of vessels going through the Persian Gulf and ultimately take military action against Iran in 1988. These unprovoked attacks on commercial shipping warrant a retaliatory military strike.

BRENNAN
: Are you- you're comparing the tanker war in the '80s to now and saying that that's the kind of military response you want to see?

COTTON: We can make a military wreck- response in a time and in a manner of our choosing. But yes, unprovoked attacks on commercial shipping warrant a retaliatory military strike against the Islamic Republic of Iran.

The goddamn “Tanker Wars"?! Oh ... you mean when, during the Iraq-Iran War, we waited until Kuwait formally asked for our assistance to escort Saddam Hussein's oil? When Reagan, without approval from Congress, reflagged Kuwaiti vessels? When Reagan got us involved in the Iraq-Iran War leading to a daylong naval battle between Iran and the US, known as Operation Praying Mantis? The conflict we jumped into that led to our mistaking an Iran Air commercial jetliner for an Iranian F-14, shooting it down and killing all 290 people onboard, including 66 children? That's what you want to repeat, Tom Cotton?! Also, whatever happened to our ally, Saddam Hussein?

They say that those who don't learn from history repeat it. Tom Cotton is here to prove Republicans never learn. Watch the video below for yourself:

Cotton says "unprovoked attacks to oil profits" from Iran "warrant a retaliatory military strike" www.youtube.com

While Tom Cotton was justifying a war with Iran on CBS, Secretary of State Mike Pompeo was having a surprisingly harder time on “Fox News Sunday" than he did on CBS when he transparently insinuated what the Trump administration really cares about with Iran ( "Texas Tea").

Pompeo: Trump doesn't war with Iran but will "defend American OIL interests" www.youtube.com

Seems Pompeo was upset that his “beating the drums of war" shtick was being interrupted to have to answer about Trump admitting (more like bragging) it was okay to take foreign assistance (and then walking it back when all the killjoys said it was illegal). After playing the ABC News clip, Chris Wallace asked a very pointed yet direct question. Pompeo's answer, however, was far from both:

WALLACE: Is accepting oppo research from a foreign government right or wrong?

POMPEO: Chris, you know you asked me not to call any of your questions today ridiculous ... You came really close right there. (awkward giggle) President Trump has been very clear. He ... he clarified his remarks later. He ... he made it very clear. Even in his first comment. He said "I'd do both." He said he'd call the FBI ...

WALLACE: He said "Maybe I'd do both."

POMPEO: President Trump has been very clear. That he will always make sure that he gets it right for the American people and I'm confident he'll do that here as well.

It was at this moment Pompeo thought he was golden because he's on Fox News and they never follow up! But clearly he forgot Chris Wallace doesn't play like that.

WALLACE: At the risk of getting your ire, the President told "Fox and Friends" on Friday, and I agree, he kind of walked it back...

POMPEO: He didn't walk it back.

WALLACE
: Yes, he did. Because he said "maybe" on Thursday. And then on Friday, on "Fox and Friends," he said "he'd listen first AND then if the information was bad that he would take it to the FBI or the Attorney General." But he also made it clear to George Stephanopolous that he did not see this as "foreign interference." And I want to play a clip of the President's own words ...

Then Wallace played ANOTHER clip of Trump's idiotic words back to Pompeo. Then he asks Pompeo one more time:

WALLACE: He says "it's not interference, it's information." The country, sir, and I don't need to tell you, has a long history dating back to George Washington in saying that foreign interference in our elections is unacceptable. POMPEO: Chris, President Trump believes that too. I have nothing further to add. I came on to talk about foreign policy and I think that's the third time you've asked me about a Washington ... piece of ... silliness. That's just, that's just a story that's inconsistent with what I've seen from President Trump do every single day.

After an awkward pause and visible anger in Pompeo's face (really, do watch), Chris Wallace calls it a day ... but remembers to remind Pompeo he's a thin-skinned baby:

WALLACE: I will leave it there. I think I only asked you twice but that's alright Mr. Secretary. Thank you. Thanks for your time and Happy Father's Day, sir.

Watch the video below for yourself.

And that's all for this week in Trump's collusion and "wag the dog"/Saudi oil interest war chants. So let's end with a couple of pictures of my new puppy, Harley Quinn!

Might as well have one last nice thing before our next war or stolen election. Have a week!


OH LOOK AT THE PUPPY. Also give us money to pay the freelancers, if you are able, thank you we love you.

How often would you like to donate?

Select an amount (USD)

$
Donate with CC

Spinal Tap - Gimme Some Money

Some dick is suing your Wonkette! If you are able, will you please send money?

1. Pick "just once" or "monthly."

2. Pick an amount, like say "all of the money."

3. Click "paypal" if you are paypal or "stripe" if you are not paypal.

4. MONEY.

5. Carry on with your day, and with new posts below!

How often would you like to donate?

Select an amount (USD)

$
Donate with CC
Donate

How often would you like to donate?

Select an amount (USD)

Newsletter

©2018 by Commie Girl Industries, Inc