Mystery Solved! Hitler-Quoting Rep's Husband Brought That Three-Percenter Truck To The Capitol Riots!
On the day of the Capitol riots, a truck was seen in some of the videos — a truck way too close to the Capitol to belong to one of the riffraff. A truck with a Three Percenter sticker on the back window. Since then, there has been much speculation as to who the truck belonged to, and how a truck with a sticker supporting an anti-government militia made it that far onto the grounds. That mystery has now been solved!
According to a report from The Daily Beast, the truck belongs to the husband of Illinois GOP Rep. Mary Miller, whom you may recall from the time she praised Hitler's understanding of the importance of the youth vote, saying "Hitler was right on one thing: He said, 'Whoever has the youth, has the future."
In an email to The Daily Beast, Chris Miller said he's never even heard of the Three Percenters before and just thought it was "a cool decal:"
"Army friend gave me decal. Thought it was a cool decal. Took it off because of negative pub," Miller wrote in an email late Thursday. He says he "never was member" of the militia and "didn't know anything about 3% till fake news started this fake story and read about them."
Um. Who are you, Chris Miller? The guy in my seventh grade French class who wore a Crimson Ghost t-shirt and then looked at me all weird when I assumed he had at least heard of The Misfits? Who does that? Also who would hand someone a Three Percenter decal — particularly someone who is married to a member of Congress and thus might come under some scrutiny for it — and not explain what it is? Does Chris Miller's friend secretly hate him?
Miller also, notably, has a bumper sticker that says "Herd Quitter," to suggest that he, unlike the rest of us, is not a sheep. Although the rest of us probably don't go around putting logos of American extremist groups on our cars just because our friend told us it would be really cool.
One would think America learned its lesson from all its poorly translated Chinese character tattoos that it is never a good idea to put up a symbol (or tattoo it on your person) without knowing what the hell it is. But of course, Chris Miller could be lying. He could be doing that.
The Three Percenters are not some newfangled thing. They've been around since 2008, and they've gotten a lot of press over the last few years, so it would be pretty difficult to avoid having heard about them, particularly if one's Army friend is going around handing out decals for no apparent reason.
The Three Percenters — should you happen to be the clueless husband of an Illinois Congresswoman who is super into cool looking decals but also never questioning what they mean — are a far-right militia movement, founded on the totally made up "fact" that only three percent of American colonists fought against the British during the American Revolution. In reality, the population at that time was only about 2.5 million — which by the way included women, children, older people, slaves and others who were not able to fight — and about 250,000 fought at some point during the war, making it about 10 percent. So they're very angry people who are also very bad at math.
Its members are known for having participated in the Unite the Right rally, raging against refugees being resettled, openly planning murder sprees if things don't go their way, building pipe-bombs, and being tricked into singing a very racist song by Sacha Baron Cohen.
Either the Millers are an incredibly ignorant family who cannot figure out that "You gotta give it to Hitler" is never going to be a good take and do not pay attention to the news or their old army buddies enough to know who the Three Percenters are, or they think we are all ignorant enough to buy that nonsense. Which of those things is better, it's hard to say.
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Robyn Pennacchia is a brilliant, fabulously talented and visually stunning angel of a human being, who shrugged off what she is pretty sure would have been a Tony Award-winning career in musical theater in order to write about stuff on the internet. Follow her on Twitter at @RobynElyse