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Nation: 'I'm With the Scary Old Man'

fredsite.jpgAs Walnuts McCain was declaring victory in the glorious never-ending war on the other candidates, the old dude from the TV was announcing that he'd recently opened a new website, called "I'm With Fred," where "Fred" fans can give him money and try to tell your friends and family to give him money.


This "new phase in the process" is proof that Fred isn't going to do things "the same old way," as most other political campaign websites are inexplicably designed around candidates handing out hundreds of dollars to random internet nerds.

Drawing on his lengthy acting career, Thompson given his website a name that sounds like a shitty mid-season replacement sitcom. Starring the kid from The Wonder Years.

I'm With Fred

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Roger Stone, you got some 'splainin' to do, Mister! Remember all those times Stone swore on his Nixon tattoo that he never had any contact with Russians, wasn't a campaign surrogate, and wasn't tipped off to stolen DNC emails in advance? Like that time he told the Washington Post:

"I've never been to Russia. I didn't talk to anybody who was identifiably Russian during the two-year run-up to this campaign," he said. "I very definitely can't think of anybody who might have been a Russian without my knowledge. It's a canard."

Stone told the House Intelligence Committee the same thing last September, but, LOL FUNNY STORY! Seems that Stone just plum forgot about that time in May, 2016 when Trump communications advisor Michael Caputo asked him to meet with Henry Greenberg, "a man with a Make America Great Again hat and a viscous Russian accent." The Washington Post reports, Greenberg was offering sexxxxy Russian dirts on Hillary Clinton, which Stone and Caputo were only too happy to grab by the pussy. But they just couldn't get there!

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Congressman Beto O'Rourke, who hopes to replace Ted Cruz in the US Senate this fall, is one of several Texas and El Paso leaders participating in a march to the just-opened tent city at the US/Mexico border in Tornillo, Texas, where children have already been imprisoned "placed."

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