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Reporter Joe Bruno shows us the actual fire door, because local teevee news

Mark Harris, the Baptist preacher turned Republican politician who "won" the fraud-soaked election for the US Congress in North Carolina's Ninth District, was in such a hurry to get away from local reporters that he fled a county building last night through an emergency exit, triggering a fire alarm. The state elections board refused to certify the outcome of the November race after credible allegations emerged that a skeevy contractor working for the Harris campaign had manipulated absentee ballots to throw the election to Harris over Democrat Dan McCready.

Naturally enough, when Harris showed up at the Charlotte Mecklenburg Government Center to address the Mecklenburg County Republicans last night, political reporters were keen to ask him how he was doing in his efforts to be accepted as the true winner -- just in case the answer had changed from NOT WELL. Instead, when journalism reared its ugly head, he bravely turned his tail and fled.


As WSOC-TV reporter Joe Bruno found, Harris was not at all eager to deal with the press:

An unidentified man tried to block reporters from using the fire escape to follow Harris. When questioned if he worked for the city, the man allowed reporters to pursue the politician.

Video of the dude actually shows him saying "yeah" in response to the question, even though he then obligingly allowed the reporters to follow Harris. But before the reporters could catch up with Harris, he was out the fire door, setting off an alarm. You know, dude, there's a sign warning you'll trigger the alarm and everything.

Still, it made for amusing video as the reporters shouted questions at the fleeing preacher:

Bruno reports that instead of holding up to talk to reporters, Harris made a beeline across the street for the parking lot of the First Baptist Church of Charlotte, where he used to be pastor. Then he dove into a car that took off with alacrity, and also with a chickenshit politician inside.

Harris later tweeted a very believable explanation: He, uh, had to duck out an emergency exit and set off an alarm because he was in a great big hurry to watch some F'ball!

Sorry I missed you guys tonight. I had to get to the kickoff of the #NationalChampionship game. We'll have plenty to talk about in the days ahead.#GoTigers

Now there's a man who's ready to be named to Congress, because he is dedicated to watching sportsball and always telling the honest truth. If not Congress, maybe the White House Press Office.

North Carolina Democratic Party chair Wayne Goodman noted that, as a former state fire marshall, he has a pretty low opinion of someone who'd misuse an emergency exit. Even if it was a very serious football/avoiding reporters emergency:

Then again, considering that the "president" of the United States is considering declaring a "national emergency" so he can have a legally dubious excuse to shift military money to building WALL, it makes all kinds of sense that a fellow Republican might have a very expansive understanding of what constitutes the proper use of an "emergency" exit.

[WSOC-TV]

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Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.

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CLEAR YOUR CALENDARS FOR FEBRUARY 7! And then fill them back up with whatever the fuck you want, because Michael Cohen has announced through his lawyers that he is too scared to testify before an open session of Congress that day, citing threats to his family from Donald Trump and Rudy Giuliani.

Wonkette has no reason to believe Cohen isn't being serious here, and NBC News reports Cohen's wife and father-in-law are particularly concerned about their safety if the man who used to call his boss MIS-TURRRR TWUMP goes to Congress and tells the truth this time. Still, we must pause to note that this is the same guy who said this to NPR reporter Tim Mak, back when Mak was at The Daily Beast:

"I will make sure that you and I meet one day while we're in the courthouse. And I will take you for every penny you still don't have," Cohen told Mak [...] "And I will come after your Daily Beast and everybody else that you possibly know."

"So I'm warning you, tread very fucking lightly, because what I'm going to do to you is going to be fucking disgusting. You understand me?"

It's not so fun when the shoe is on the other foot, IS IT, MICHAEL?

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Did Nancy Pelosi do something to give Donald Trump the mistaken impression he has leverage here? We don't remember her doing anything like that!

Trump sent Pelosi a letter this morning to say that, despite how she told him to stay the fuck out of her House because of his government shutdown, he would still be coming to the House on January 29 to deliver his State of the Union address. And for some weird-ass reason, Trump and his advisers in the White House actually thought she would back down. It's both hilarious and alarming that Trump and his people are that stupid, isn't it?

Anyway, Pelosi took the dare. She took the dare. Was there anybody besides those dumb fucking idiots in the White House who thought she wouldn't take the dare?

Pelosi sent a letter right back to Trump to kindly explain to him that no means "go fuck yourself," and that if he'd like her to stick her foot further up his ass and kick it around a bunch, he's welcome to test her some more:

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