New York Attorney General Eric Schneiderman, GET THE FUCK OUT

It's been three hours since Ronan Farrow and Jane Meyer at the New Yorker broke theirNOOOO FUCKKKKK bombshell about New York Attorney General Eric Schneiderman beating up a series of girlfriends. Following calls from the governor, the state's junior senator, and your editrix, Schneiderman has resigned.

This is horrible news in that Schneiderman was a bulwark in case President Donald Trump (sigh) fired the special counsel, Bob Mueller; it was well-known that state charges can't be pardoned by a president, and Schneiderman was the best bet for following through on all and any money-laundering, conspiracy, and general RICO charges stemming from law-breakery both before and after the 2016 election. It's worse news in that we're faced with the fact that Eric Schneiderman, despite having been a terrific force for the liberal belief in the Rule of Law, is a HOLY SHIT ABUSIVE PIECE OF FILTH. His girlfriends -- two on the record and two whose anonymous stories were corroborated by the New Yorker -- describe similar stories of him slapping them to the ground, threatening them, choking them ... this despite the "good guy" who actually criminalized strangulation when he realized so many domestic violence perpetrators could skate because choking someone wasn't actually outlawed.

If your first concern is that somehow Trump's people, on the heels of the Black Cube nonsense, made Democrats aware there is dirt and there would be hell to pay, stop. The New Yorker story makes clear that a staffer who is friends with one of Schneiderman's girlfriends helped her to get her shit out of his apartment after he clocked her; the two surmised that surely she couldn't have been the first woman he abused. And there is nothing nuanced about Schneiderman's serial domestic violence; it's not a matter of "Al Franken slid his hand down a lady's ass during a photo op and now we better all be consistent." Schneiderman had a history of hitting, choking, spitting on, and threatening his girlfriends. "I am the law," he told one, because he is a fucking movie villain written by someone stupid. When he made a big deal out of his feminist credentials in prosecuting Harvey Weinstein -- who is a straight-up rapist -- his girlfriends, on their own, could live with their silence no longer and decided time was fucking UP.

If your second concern is that Donald Trump will have even a moment of happiness, well, #metoo. My ass is chapped and my gears are ground, but if it's any consolation, read this AP story about how Trump is mad at Rudy Giuliani. Maybe it will make you feel better.

Read the whole disgusting thing at the New Yorker. It's important to bear witness, and it's critical to see the totality of what a supposed feminist man perpetrated on people who loved him. No one is irreplaceable. And there will be no -- NO -- defense of him. (If you decide to be contrarian anyway in the comments, we're not gonna dig you out from under the vicious dogpile that will surely ensue.) His pathetic statement, before resigning hours later, claimed it was kinky sex and consensual. Read the New Yorker, which takes great pains to put the lie where it belongs.

It is right and good that Schneiderman resigned quickly. It is wrong and bad that he tried to weasel out of it even for a minute. He's clearly an alcoholic, which is in no way an excuse. Let him get sober and do about 30 years of penance, working for good without his name in the papers, and maybe his obituary will be kind.


Rebecca Schoenkopf

Rebecca Schoenkopf is the owner, publisher, and editrix of Wonkette. She is a nice lady, SHUT UP YUH HUH. She is very tired with this fucking nonsense all of the time, and it would be terrific if you sent money to keep this bitch afloat. She is on maternity leave until 2033.


How often would you like to donate?

Select an amount (USD)


©2018 by Commie Girl Industries, Inc