Nice Time! Cleveland Baseball Team Picks New, Non-Racist Name!


Good news for Ohioans who like baseball but don't want to go around wearing a racially insensitive jersey in public! Cleveland's baseball club has decided to change their name from the Indians to the Guardians.

The new team name was announced on Friday with a lovely video narrated by Tom Hanks for some reason. He's from California, so I'm not sure what the connection is there, but hey! Tom Hanks! Everyone loves Tom Hanks, except for weird QAnon people.

Oh! Maybe because of A League of Their Own? Maybe it ends with him saying "There's no crying in baseball!" and I just missed that because I actually only watched the first 50 seconds?

The name choice was one of several that were being considered, one of which was the Cleveland Spiders, the team's name in the 1890s, before they were the Cleveland Indians — which seems to have been the popular choice on Twitter.

The Guardians was chosen not in an effort to save paint due to its phonetic similarity to The Indians, but rather to statues along the Hope Memorial Bridge called "The Guardians of Transportation."

Nice! I would say I hope they win all the games now but I think I am legally obligated to vote for the Red Sox as a matter of familial tradition.

It would sure be nice if a certain Washington Football Team could take note of this and the fact that no one fell down dead as the result of a sports team changing their name to something non-racist.


Do your Amazon shopping through this link, because reasons.

Wonkette is independent and fully funded by readers like you. Click below to tip us!

How often would you like to donate?

Select an amount (USD)

Robyn Pennacchia

Robyn Pennacchia is a brilliant, fabulously talented and visually stunning angel of a human being, who shrugged off what she is pretty sure would have been a Tony Award-winning career in musical theater in order to write about stuff on the internet. Follow her on Twitter at @RobynElyse


How often would you like to donate?

Select an amount (USD)


©2018 by Commie Girl Industries, Inc