Halp! Halp! The NRA Is Bein' Repressed!
HOLY SHIT!!! ARE WE ... WINNING? Is it possible that we're actually starting to hit the gunhumpers where it hurts, right in their fleshy, fat wallets? MAYBE! Because suddenly insurance companies are fresh out of policies when the NRA comes calling. And banks are just too full to store the NRA's sacks of blood money -- even though the sacks get smaller every day. And maybe the organization will have to shut down entirely if they can't get liability coverage any more. SAD!
But these colors don't run -- whatever the hell that means. So the NRA is suing Governor Andrew Cuomo and the State of New York for trampling its First Amendment right to market death machines and mop up cash forever. How dare he side with the Big Live Kids Lobby! This aggression will not stand, man!
It all started last September, when the New York County district attorney met with Everytown for Gun Safety to talk about murdering the NRA with laws. Yes, you should probably sit down for a story where THE GODDAMN NRA sues to prevent anti-gun lobbyists from interfering in the sacred political process. The fumes coming off that pure, uncut irony can knock you on your ass!
Shortly after the meeting, the New York State Department of Financial Services (DFS) launched an investigation of companies that do business with the NRA. First they fined two insurance carriers for selling banned Self Defense Policies to pay your legal fees in case you accidentally murder a brown kid for carrying Skittles home from the convenience store. Or playing his music too loud. Or walking down the street in your neighborhood. Turns out it's a violation of state law to sell insurance that indemnifies gun nuts for "intentional acts of wrongdoing." Who knew? Not Ken Cuccinelli!
And then Governor Cuomo suggested that businesses in New York might give some thought to their ongoing relationships with gun nuts and their lobby groups.
I am directing the Department of Financial Services to urge insurers and bankers statewide to determine whether any relationship they may have with the NRA or similar organizations sends the wrong message to their clients and their communities who often look to them for guidance and support. This is not just a matter of reputation, it is a matter of public safety, and working together, we can put an end to gun violence in New York once and for all.
Which does have the faint tinge of nice business, be a shame if something should happen to it. And you know what?
Bring your stupid lawsuit, NRA! See if you can convince a judge that your insurance carrier dropped you last February because of Andrew Cuomo, and not because of massive social pressure from Moms Demand Action, and Everytown, and Sleeping Giants, and the Parkland kids. Hey, remember what else happened last February? A guy walked into Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School and shot 34 people with an assault rifle. Did you forget about the 17 DEAD KIDS when you were making the case against Cuomo for Tortious Interference With Prospective Economic Advantage? Might be tricky to prove CUOMO DID IT while simultaneously attacking David Hogg for orchestrating a smear campaign against your "social welfare organization." But good luck getting the head of Lloyd's of London to take the witness stand and testify that it was the New York State Department of Financial Services that put a bullet in your insurance policy!
Here, let's enjoy some NRA whining.
For example, financial institutions previously doing business with the NRA, such as Lockton, Chubb, and Lloyd's, are ending their business relationships, or exploring such action, due to fear of monetary sanctions or expensive public investigations. The Corporate Carrier has now stated that it was unwilling to renew coverage at any price. The NRA has spoken to numerous carriers in an effort to obtain replacement corporate insurance coverage; nearly every carrier has indicated that it fears transacting with the NRA specifically in light of DFS's actions against Lockton and Chubb. Furthermore, multiple banks withdrew their bids following the issuance of the April 2018 Letters, based on concerns that any involvement with the NRA—even providing the organization with bank-depository services—would expose them to regulatory reprisals. [Emphasis original.]
They'll take your Get Out of Jail For Murder Insurance when they can pry it out of your COLD DEAD HANDS! Or else they'll just cancel the policy. (Prolly the second one, TBH.)
And what's this we hear about NRATV getting bullied off the air by those moms who value their kids' lives more than your God-given right to walk around with a death-stick slung over your shoulder?
Insurance coverage is necessary for the NRA to continue its existence as a not-for-profit organization and fulfill its advocacy objectives. Without appropriate media coverage, for example, there is a substantial risk that NRATV will be forced to cease operating; moreover, the NRA could be forced to cease circulation of various print publications and magazines. Additionally, the NRA cannot maintain its physical premises, convene off-site meetings and events, operate educational programs promoting the safe use of firearms, or hold rallies, conventions and assemblies without general liability and related "umbrella" coverage, or event-specific coverage.
Oh, that would be a goddamn tragedy. Quick, Dana Loesch! Make another one of your not at all insane videos to rally the troops.
That'll do the trick! You'll be out from under that $43 million of debt and $40 million of pension obligation in no time.
AND THE COUNTRY WAS SAVED.
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Liz Dye lives in Baltimore with her wonderful husband and a houseful of teenagers. When she isn't being mad about a thing on the internet, she's hiding in plain sight in the carpool line. She's the one wearing yoga pants glaring at her phone.