You know what has three syllables? "Matt Damon." Also "Ben Affleck." Now, scientific research proves that "Obama" also has three syllables, and thus is eligible for the Sarah Silverman formulation of "I'm fucking [three-syllable word]" for instant comedy gold.

Of all the bizarre suggestions, accusations, and conclusions drawn in this primary season, by far the weirdest is the notion that Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama might actually be attracted to each other, sexually. We realize this speculation is mostly just the political dork's version of making Barbie dolls hump each other. Still: gross. Want proof? There's this video.

On the other hand, the following is pretty funny.

I'm F*cking Obama - Hillary Clinton feat. Sarah Silverman [YouTube]