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Occupation Dispatch #10, In Which Riley Prepares To Be Cleaned & Beaten

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Hello again! Your #OWS correspondent has returned from a weird, rainy night full of .... cleaning? In the above YouTube movie, we see two park savages frantically trying to sweep away all of the bodily fluids and hypodermic needles that have accumulated over the last few weeks in Zuccotti Park. (Is that soapy water, or "runoff" from the constant finger-bang Groupons that are going on at all hours of the day, according to Sean Hannity? We'll never know/of course it's semen!) This OCD cleaning session was part of a malicious and extremely successful plan to make Michael Bloomberg and his billionaire pals looks like complete douchebags -- and hooray, it worked! Poor (but actually very rich) Michael Bloomberg! Maybe the FBI could murder everyone in Zuccotti Park and then blame Iran? No, that would be retarded.

And here's a strange video compilation, which includes exclusive MTV "Cribs" footage of the interior of our ramshackle tarp fort:

Let's see, what else? Oh right, a policeman "punched a protester on the side of the head" this morning, for no reason whatsoever.

In other News: Your humble correspondent will probably be teargassed tomorrow afternoon in Times Square! Look for him on the teevee news! (He'll be the one curled up in a little fetus ball, crying and crying as police boots flatten him into the world's saddest crepe.)

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Well, not really a bar, but a conference, and not just any conference, baybee. We're talking BIO, the annual gathering of biotech execs, policy makers, and scientists put on by the Biotechnology Innovation Organization (aka, not just a lobbying group!). Who has two thumbs and attended the gathering a couple of weeks ago? This Mexican.

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It's a new week in America, and as usual everything is going to hell, because that's what happens when you allow 70,000 "economic anxiety" voters in the Rust Belt, Vladimir Putin, and James Comey to decide an election. We will have many stories about Donald Trump's brutal crackdown on Hispanic toddlers today, but in this post, we must revisit that greatest of Americans, Devin Fucking Nunes, congressman from California, possible literal actual Russian agent and (alleged) cow romancer from all the most romantic novels about cow romance. As the French say, ooh la la FUCKING DEVIN.

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