Oh No, The President's Various Wives Are Fighting
Can they both lose the fight?
Oh no, whatever shall America do, now that Ivana Trump and Melania Trump are having an argument over who is the real first lady?
Ivana Trump, ex-wife of Donald and mother to Ivanka, Donald Jr., and Eric, sat down with Good Morning America because she’s got a new “tell-all” book to sell.
Ivana said she doesn’t call Trump at the White House “because Melania is there and I don’t want to cause any kind of jealousy or something like that because I am basically first Trump wife, I’m First Lady, okay?”
AW SHIT MELANIA YOU GONNA LET IVANA SAY THAT, OR ARE YOU GONNA TAKE THIS OUTSIDE? As it turns out, she is going to take this outside:
This is actually fucking happening. This is what America looks like now that it's GREAT AGAIN.
Also? Idiots need to STFU. The first lady's name is Ivanka Trump, and she is a complete asshole. Meanwhile, Marla Maples retains her title as best Trump wife, obviously.
Anyway, Trump must have heard Bob Corker say he was running the Oval like it was "The Apprentice," and think, "Yeah watch this, buddy, I'll see your 'Apprentice' and raise you 'Real Housewives,' and I won't even pay Andy Cohen royalties, because I am a dumb cock who doesn't pay my bills." Then he called Ivana like, "Say some shit and make Melania mad. Try to start a fight with Marla too!" (She did.)
Speaking of Andy Cohen:
Please Jesus, make all of this stop.
And now it's your open thread! Try to talk about literally anything besides the subject of this post.
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