We think this may be 'shopped, since we 'shopped it

Now that Democrats have taken over the House of Representatives -- or will, come January -- they'll be able to remind the Trump administration that "oversight" isn't just a noun wedged between "inexcusable" and "by compliant Republicans." That's going to be a bit of a change from the first two years of this "presidency," when House committees mostly did everything they could to help Trump cover up and deflect attention from his shady behavior, not to mention taking a wrecking ball to consumer protections and regulations on industry. Now that there'll be a whole new crop of committee chairs with subpoena power, let's look at the wish list for the top investigations they should get on right away.

Russia, duh.

Donald Trump was very certain he'd been completely cleared by the House Intelligence Committee's investigation of contacts between his campaign and Russia, because after all, the investigation didn't bother looking too closely. Now that Adam Schiff will be chairing the committee, expect a closer look, including subpoenas of all those jerks who refused to answer questions the first time around. The main job of investigating Trump-Russia remains Robert Mueller's, of course, but the House will finally be digging into stuff that Devin Nunes for some reason had no interest in examining.

While they're at it, Dems on both Intel and Foreign Affairs will probably want to look at what actually went on during Trump's Helsinki meeting with Putin -- at the very least, maybe we can finally find out whether anyone in Trump's administration was ever briefed on what they talked about.

Other foreign stuff up for investigation? Schiff wants to look at the North Korea "nuclear deal," like maybe seeing if there even is such a thing. And yes, how about a close look at whether our great friends the Saudis may have told Trump what to think about the murder of Jamal Khashoggi?

Hey, how about looking into that Trump Tower computer that kept talking to that Russian bank, too? Seems like a loose end somebody should tie up.

Donald Trump's Taxes Remain Nobody's Business, OK?

Get ready for a demand for Trump to turn over his tax returns, which is a power Congress has but decided not to bother with the past two years. Dems are ready to be a bit more oversighty this time around, so get ready for Trump to get even pissier and to insist it's a "disgrace" even more than ever.

Richard E. Neal (D-Mass.), the presumptive Ways and Means Committee chairman, has said he intends to obtain them once in power, using a 1924 law that gives heads of the congressional tax-writing committees the right to request any person's tax returns. The panel could then make them public with a simple majority vote.

Trump and other conservatives have suggested that the White House might fight any effort by Democrats to obtain the tax returns, setting up a possible constitutional challenge that tests a nearly 94-year-old law.

Expect Trump to be an asshole about that. In his insane presser this morning, he insisted, for the first time in quite a while, that he can't possibly show anyone his taxes, because would you believe they're STILL being audited?

Other inquiries into Trump's sleazy business operations are likely to come from the presumptive chair of the House Financial Services Committee, Maxine Waters.

Waters has requested — and as the committee head could subpoena — records that could dislodge closely held details of Deutsche Bank's relationship with the Trump Organization.

The German bank lent Trump more than $400 million during a decade-long real estate buying spree that began in 2005, largely through its private wealth management office, not the commercial banking division that typically handles real estate.

Maybe Government Agencies Should Do Their Jobs?

The committees with oversight power for cabinet agencies are likely to be very, very busy, too, insisting the EPA should at least occasionally protect the environment, that our immigration laws can be enforced without throwing children in cages, and that thousands of US citizens shouldn't be poisoned by lead or left to die after a hurricane, even if they're on an island surrounded by big water:

[Incoming House Oversight Committee] chairman Elijah E. Cummings (D-Md.) already plans to look into the "zero tolerance" policy that caused the detention of thousands of migrant children who were separated from their families while trying to cross the U.S.-Mexico border, and the administration's intention to include a citizenship question on the 2020 Census.

The panel is also planning a broad investigation of the White House's security clearance process, after Trump's son-in-law and adviser Jared Kushner and former staff secretary Rob Porter were revealed to be working without full clearances.

The panel wants to balance those inquiries with renewed attention to the administration's widely criticized response to Puerto Rico in the aftermath Hurricane Maria, and the continuing water crisis in Flint, Mich.

Already, some Democrats are fretting that if the House does too much investigating, that could backfire by making Trump look like he's being victimized, the poor dear. That's a concern which seems never to have occurred to the Republicans who investigated Benghazi again and again, although of course that was different, because as we all know, Hillary Clinton was a very untrustworthy person.

In any case, Donald Trump has the proper relationship between the branches of government all worked out. He explained it's really very simple. If Democrats investigate him, he'll just investigate them harder, and also maybe he won't let any legislation pass for the rest of his term:

Gosh, he's a smart cookie. He'll really teach them!

[WaPo / New Yorker / Vox]

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Doktor Zoom

Doktor Zoom's real name is Marty Kelley, and he lives in the wilds of Boise, Idaho. He is not a medical doctor, but does have a real PhD in Rhetoric. You should definitely donate some money to this little mommyblog where he has finally found acceptance and cat pictures. He is on maternity leave until 2033. Here is his Twitter, also. His quest to avoid prolixity is not going so great.

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One of the most common things to say in America, just behind "Happy Birthday" and "NO COLLUSION," is "Mitch McConnell should go fuck himself." It works for all occasions, whether you have just stubbed your toe or whether you are in the middle of your wedding to your sweetheart. Try it!

But why should Mitch McConnell go fuck himself at this particular moment? Let's look at the top three current reasons!

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Sucks to be you, Pat Shanahan! The acting Defense secretary is currently under investigation for preferential treatment of his former bosses at Boeing, who just got busted letting planes fall out of the sky if buyers skimped on the upgrades. Shanahan was never a favorite of Trump's, and now his chances of getting made Big Boy For Real Sec Def are decreasing by the day. Which means that he's going through all this shit for nothing! Womp womp!

What shit, you ask? Well! Last night Shanahan announced the first tranche of the "found" money the DoD is shifting over to fund WALL in defiance of Congress's constitutional spending powers. The Defense Department will be transferring the cash from accounts meant to support military personnel into "anti-drug funding," which they've decided means they can use it to build "18-foot-high pedestrian fencing, constructing and improving roads, and installing lighting within the Yuma and El Paso Sectors of the border." Already pissed off about the fake EMERGY declaration, although not pissed enough to override a veto, congresspeople on both sides of the aisle are hopping mad that the Trump administration dicked them around for months, shut down the government, forced them to negotiate for wall funding in good faith, and then said HA HA SUCKERS, WE'RE JUST GOING TO STEAL IT FROM THE RAINY DAY FUND ANYWAY!

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