A Cyborg Army of Tim Pawlentys Will Beam Down From Space To Kill Us All

We're pretty sure that's the only way to interpret this warning from Tim Pawlenty. This is HORRIFYING. Whatever you do, don't elect this machine president!

That's what the spaceship will look like when the Pawlentys come for us. Save this image on your phone or whatever for reference.

In a dystopian post-Pawlenty-invasion reality, our televisions will have OLD-TIMEY KNOBS and BE VERY BAD AT KEEPING THE PICTURE CENTERED. Scary!

You don't even want to try to go to the website on this sign, because, to your horror, you will realize it no longer exists due to our impending Pawlenty overlords EATING IT WITH THEIR HIDEOUS SHARP TEETH.

Oh, just some black women taking memento photos of a lame white male Republican presidential candidate they went to meet. Wait, when has that ever happened?! The Pawlentys must have programmed their brains to follow our human scent and the flashes mark our skulls with tracking radiation!

Dear God, what is this terrifying monster? We must take our cyanide pills now before the Pawlentys come and we're face-to-face with this odd, surely bloodthirsty creature.

(This is a terrific campaign ad that will give voters piece of mind, is what we're saying.) [ YouTube ]