Finally! A Gas Station For Me, A Woman! Thanks Shell! #GIRLBOSS
That is some quality International Women's Day pandering right there
I don't drive.
It's not because of how I am a woman and everyone knows we are bad at driving, but rather because I live in a city with very good public transportation and owning a car would be a big pain in the ass. But that doesn't mean I don't enjoy a little when giant evil corporations take a break from murdering the environment to do a little International Women's Day pandering!
And that's just what Shell is doing this year. Sort of! As part of the company's International Women's Day festivities, a female-owned gas station in San Dimas, California will be putting an apostrophe on it's logo so that it reads "She'll" instead of "Shell."
HUH!
I'm sorry, I had to. Giphy
The "She Will" initiative is aimed at "inspiring the female leaders of tomorrow by closing the gender gap in engineering and technology through education, engagement, and awareness across the organization and industry," a spokesperson for the company said.
Patty Lanning, a female employee at Shell, said, "The kind of future I hope for all girls is that we get to a point in time where we aren't even having the conversation about gender equality in the workplace because we are already living in an environment where it is 50/50."
Shell plans to roll out of the new logos on Sunday, March 8 across their social channels.
I mean, I know I've always thought to myself "If only it were women refusing to take any responsibility for human rights abuses in Nigeria and causing giant oil spills in California! That is definitely the whole entire problem with that company!"
In addition to the change logos, Shell is also running a very woke advertisement/PSA featuring a bunch of smiling women with phrases like "She will inspire the future" and "She will be recognized" and "She will keep attempting to do offshore drilling in the arctic." (OK, maybe not that one)
She will totally see through this woke shit. #Shell https: //t.co/TgLUSKQDth
— Sietske Bergsma (@Sietske Bergsma) 1583590915.0
Wow, I feel so seen as a woman and inspired to go out into the world, exacerbate climate change and then #roséallday! I can bring home the bacon, fry it up in a pan, and support the execution of a Nigerian journalist/environmental activist getting in the way of all the drilling we are doing in his homeland.
To their credit, the background music of the ad is not a Maroon 5 song.
This is surely just the start of Shell's foray into participating in holidays like this, and it is rumored (by me) that on April 30th, National Honesty Day, they will be changing their slogan to " Fuck You ."
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Funny, that was the exact part that I have the most self-doubt about, as the scansion is badly off, requiring, as it does, that the second syllable of "moral" fall on the second syllable.
I justified the cheat (to myself) by reasoning that song is a folk song and all the rules are suspended.
What I Learned on RWNJ Talk Radio This Weekend, part eleventy jillion:
1. The coronavirus is spreading in Seattle, LA, and SF because the progressives who run those once wonderful cities are letting homeless people camp out and shit on the sidewalk. We need a zero tolerance policy to clean up our streets. Why, you can't walk anywhere in SF without seeing someone dropping a deuce.
2. Nurses are spreading it. They used to care about their work but they turned nursing into a gig economy job. They spend 10 hours a week at a hospital, 15 hours at a nursing home, etc. If they just settled into one job, they would not spread the coronavirus so much.