Did Rick Perry exist before he surfed a wave of sucky GOP presidential-field moping to the national stage in August 2011? Did anything exist before 2011? The science is still out on that one (science is a liberal conspiracy), but that has not stopped the Internet from wondering, "how will Rick Perry perform in a presidential debate when we have never seen him debate before?" Luckily the Texas Tribune has compiled a video montage preview! We will spoil the first clip, from 2010: Rick Perry does a very good George W.-style demonic giggle when he is asked questions he does not like!
Uh, what else. In the second clip, from 2006, he appears to be checking his notes every four seconds or so and ticking off things he likes about Texas until the moderator cuts him off, and then he looks relieved. In the third clip, from 2002, Perry's head goes full helmet with the hairspray and he looks uncomfortable trying to string long sentences together on the fly. In sum: awkward giggles and bad hair-dos. Rick Perry is secretly a 13-year-old girl, which makes sense. [ Texas Tribune ]
Marcus will do Perry. And his hair.
More fun: watching Mitt try to crucify Rick without offending the teatards he's trying to suck up to. The whole "Perry's a secret liberal" schtick is going to be pretty hard for a government-health-plan-creating Massachusetts governor to pull off.