Robyn, I do wonder what you do for the skin under your eyes. The only thing that works for undereye bags is 1. genetics, and 2. getting enough sleep. Something that's been difficult since 2015. But if you have something for that area of the face to recommend, I'm ready to believe you!
That cat is such a smoosh darling and I’m just in love. What a cuddle puddle Zor must have been, and his name belies the sort of epic ruler he must have been!
I was the woman in Sephora looking to up my skincare game by starting with "I"m not in the market for $300 skincare". Genetics and a less-than ideal body kept me out of the sun (well, that and the fact that I don't tan, just turn a kind of pale beige) so now I only use sunscreen and tinted moisturizer or a very lightweight foundation. Hate drinking water so I'm bad about that. If I do wear foundation, I love Smashbox Photo Finish as a base and Urban Decay's All Nighter as a setting spray.
Sounds like I need to up my skincare game. Right now I double cleanse (Erno Laszlo cleansing oil/cleansing bar) AM and PM, sunscreen on the face in the morning, and face oil AND heavy moisturizer at night. I mean I just grease my face right up at night! But when I wake up my face is so soft.
Also, I usually empty my 40 ounce faux Stanley mug twice every day.
No skin care product does more for your face than drinking enough water. You can spend hundreds of dollars on skin care but if you aren’t hydrating your insides, you’ll see it in your face.
I've long been a fan of Dr Bronner's castile soap. Currently working on a big bottle of hemp tea tree.
Six years ago I had five excisions on the face and an incision near one eye (all negative, mostly things my mother was prone to) and each follow up my plastic surgeon says I make him look good. The melanocytes are coming back very slowly.
I am restricted by my husband’s sensitivity to scent. I have found the Korean cosmetics and face products really great for that reason. CosRX is my go to brand for most stuff.
Tell me about it!!!! Sometimes I wish the fungus that got into my husband’s nose and partially disabled his smelling ability would come back. I actually wore light perfume sometimes and he didn’t know. It also made me aware that it is partially psychological about his inability to tolerate any kind of scent (because the “scent” didn’t give him asthma when he couldn’t smell it). He has a genuine allergy to pollen…so the scent of flowers is really upsetting to him.
I am routinely mistaken for someone 10-15 years younger. I keep a minimalist routine- I slap on a good retinol serum at night (currently using Cerave Skin Renewing, $18 most places), I slap on a good SPF 55 in the morning (Neutrogena Ultra Sheer, $10 almost anywhere) and I use a light moisturizer before the sun screen but after the retinol (Clinique Dramatically Different aka "yellow lotion" - about $15-20 anywhere if you can find it on sale.)
I use cheaper SPF 50 on the rest of my body, and also the purple Cerave eye renewal ($15 most places.)
My favorite "skinfluencer" (to use that awful term) is Lab Muffin Beauty Science out of Australia. She has a PhD in chemistry and worked in shampoo formulations for a while. She does a great job debunking bad beauty science and explaining why we don't need to be afraid of most of chemicals used in our products these days, because a century of improved testing and the abandonment of many bad practices and dangerous ingredients has made the mid grade stuff on the shelves safe and quite effective.
Just don't ever use any stuff that is UNLABELED - there was a recent Chubby Emu video about a woman who ended up with severe mercury poisoning because of the skin lightening cream she was sold on the black market.
Bonus minimalist makeup routine, for when I'm going out drinking or someplace where I need to be fancy. This whole mess takes me under five minutes.
- Fresh application of lotion base (good old yellow lotion)
- Benefit Pore Professional, original, on the T-zone. I don't have severe acne scarring or bad wrinkles, but I do have a few deeper pores, and this stops foundation from settling into them.
- If I'm going for a heavy night of drinking or I'm having a bad skin day, I'll brush on a light dusting of Tint d'oil from Lancôme. They're the only foundation that comes in my stupidly pale shade AND can be applied with a brush despite being a liquid. Even, very light light coverage, only on the bits of my face that really need it.
- Tightline eyeliner. Currently using a liquid dark brown from Nyx. I have double hooded eyes that turn up making trendy extended lined eyes impossible, but a tight line works fine. No mascara.... it'll just melt the first time I cry from laughing too hard.
- Magic hyper shift loose powder from Surreal Makeup on the eyes. I like "Illusion" for a professional look and "Autumn Nights" for fancy times.. You get eye looks that would take an Instagram a good five minutes ... in a single jar of powder and about ten seconds. Impossible to mess up putting on, and impossible to mess up while wearing. I'm never going back to single shade eyeshadow.
- I usually don't bother much with blush but if it's a special occasion I'll rub in some random berry cream stuff from Clinique I got from a bonus time bag. It's probably time to replace it, but I use it so rarely it feels kind of wasteful to throw away an almost full tube and buy something new.
- No lipstick. I live and die by Purestick peppermint chapstick. I'm allergic to lanolin so most chapsticks are right out, but that particular brand doesn't have lanolin so I'm saved!
Well, I guess I'll be spending my first PAYCHECK IN A YEAR on a lot of this. My skincare isn't horrible, but again, 61 and counting. I got a neck lift and a lower lid blepheroplasty in early 2020, no regrets.
I've been considering a neck lift. I have chicken neck wattle due to weight loss hollowing out my double chin and leaving saggy skin in its place. How long was the recovery time?
For the really obvious stuff, about a week. For swelling and back to mostly normal, about a month. Then gradually better. I've got neck wattles again (not as much) but I don't have the face sag (which was actually uncomfortable for me). The down side is a bit of that 'pulled' look from certain angles and I did lose a bit of feeling on my ears from a little nerve damage (very common). If you're gonna have work done, this and the lower lids doesn't make you look freakish at all.
That "beatnik" girl's beautiful, and looks a little like Audrey Hepburn...if they just left her hair kind of loose she would have looked perfect and not older.
Though I have to agree with the "you need height in your hair" for round faces--since I look like a candied apple, I miss the days of "big hair"...
It's one of those things--if you're 20, actually you are just beautiful no matter what. No exceptions. You can do anything and you're still gorgeous. Just put on sunscreen, darling beautiful ones, and make sure to smile more than you frown, because 50+ comes sooner than you think.
Nothing wrong with 50+!!! I like Bobby Brown’s philosophy …it is not to look “young” but to look just look “good”. If you have a light in your eyes and an ebullient spirit you are gorgeous to me!!!
Nothing at all wrong with it! It's just that if you spend the previous 50 years hating and scowling nothing's going to "fix" it. I'm with you--what's free and powerful is working to keep a happy, laughter-filled, positive, loving spirit, and the rest will follow (but also wear sunscreen).
It is only in the last few years that I have started taking care of my face. I have always lotioned my body but I seem to have developed very dry legs and arms. I use CeraVe everything. The Neutrogena hydrating face stuff made my skin oily. I use Aquaphor on my lips. My hair care is more expensive because of the pink hair. I use Ouai oil to keep the moisture in.
I am completely ignorant to all things skincare related. I am also fortunate to be approaching 40 and still have the skin of someone in their early 20s. Guess there were some good genes in my family after all.
What would you recommend for an oily skinned 15 year old who is not happy about teenage acne and the associated bullying from her peers? Particularly one who is on a limited budget?
I was blessed to not have acne as a teen, just occasional pimples. As Robyn says below, I went way overboard trying to prevent pimples, overdrying my skin. For the longest time, I bought products for dry skin. It was a never ending cycle until I stopped.
That was ok until I turned 34 with the onset of Adult Acne. All of a sudden, I had pizza face. I was able to find a black dermatologist who specialized in problems specific to black skin, like keloids. My father had keloids and you do not want those bad boys on your face. She immediately put me on antibiotics to kill the infections. That was a 3 month course. Then she prescribed Retin-A in 0.1% strength, a cream that contains prescription strength retinoids. specifically tretinoin. It's used in the topical treatment of acne and to reduce wrinkles. Eventually, we cut back to 0.05% and the 0.05% in the winter and 0.1% in the summer.
Once, years later when I needed to refill the prescription, I decided to stop using Retin-A, just to see what would happen. And nothing did. I still didn't have acne. Just the occasional pimple, which i would treat with salicylic acid, the same chemicals that are in aspirin.
Now, I would suggest that she use Differin for acne. It's a over the counter retinoid that used to be prescription. It can be used with benzoyl peroxide to dry up existing pustules and to prevent new ones.
If she doesn't respond to this home treatment, then it's time to see a doctor.
She also needs to be practicing good hygiene. Wash her face in the morning and before going to bed. And after exercising. Use a mild facial cleanser and toner. If she's using makeup to try to cover up the acne, stop. It only aggravates acne and looks ridiculous IMHO. Mascara and lip stuff is ok. And get a facial moisturizer with at least SPF30. YOu can get it oil-free. I liked Neutrogena until I switched to Oil of Olay because old and wrinkle prevention.
I hope this helps from a survivor. Now let's see what Penn and Teller have to say about acne:
As someone who until I started hitting menopause had very oily skin, and at 15 you could have drilled for oil in my face, good quality witch hazel worked best for me. My preferred brand is Dr. Thayer. They've started bringing out a full skin care line, that I would have killed for back in the day. I currently use their daily facial cleanser and lavender witch hazel as a toner, quick wipe down in a pinch refresher. It's about $10 for 8 ounces.
So, first of all — don't overdo it on the exfoliating or anything that dries skin out. That can often have the opposite effect and cause skin to produce more oil to make up for it. The Glow Recipe Watermelon toner I mentioned is good because of the BHA/PHA in it, but it is quite expensive. Some by Mi is an affordable alternative that I know a lot of people with acne issues really like (though apparently it's one of those that will break you out before it clears you up)
Products with salicylic acid, snail mucin, tiger grass (which is calming), cica, niacinamide, green tea, soothing clay masks can all be helpful.
Double cleansing with mild, gentle products (no fragrances) is also always a good idea. Would stick to the Korean stuff because American products can be really harsh.
For excess oil, blotting papers are a good, for individual zits, hydrocolloid stickers (get them at Marshalls, WAY less expensive). And again, SPF is extra important to prevent scarring.
Oh! All of those products are available in the UK. BUT my favorite skincare vlogger is British and he might have some good tips about products there on his YouTube (honestly, he and his brother who does makeup videos do know a lot, but also they just have very soothing voices and I will listen to them talk about anything).
As someone who until I started hitting menopause had very oily skin, especially as a teenager I found a better quantity witch hazel worked for me. My preferred brand is Dr.Thayer. They've started bringing out an entire skin care line, and I use their pH Balancing Daily Cleanser. Their stuff is pretty reasonable, around $10 per 8 ounces.
Got around to my Marshalls trip. The Esfolio collagen cleansing foam is 4.99, and they hide it well.
That Beatnik-to-Posh girl ivideo is brutal. the narrator is also giving a very mixed message.
Thank you for this amazing essay! My face is falling apart and maybe this will help ❤️
Robyn, I do wonder what you do for the skin under your eyes. The only thing that works for undereye bags is 1. genetics, and 2. getting enough sleep. Something that's been difficult since 2015. But if you have something for that area of the face to recommend, I'm ready to believe you!
That cat is such a smoosh darling and I’m just in love. What a cuddle puddle Zor must have been, and his name belies the sort of epic ruler he must have been!
I was the woman in Sephora looking to up my skincare game by starting with "I"m not in the market for $300 skincare". Genetics and a less-than ideal body kept me out of the sun (well, that and the fact that I don't tan, just turn a kind of pale beige) so now I only use sunscreen and tinted moisturizer or a very lightweight foundation. Hate drinking water so I'm bad about that. If I do wear foundation, I love Smashbox Photo Finish as a base and Urban Decay's All Nighter as a setting spray.
Sounds like I need to up my skincare game. Right now I double cleanse (Erno Laszlo cleansing oil/cleansing bar) AM and PM, sunscreen on the face in the morning, and face oil AND heavy moisturizer at night. I mean I just grease my face right up at night! But when I wake up my face is so soft.
Also, I usually empty my 40 ounce faux Stanley mug twice every day.
No skin care product does more for your face than drinking enough water. You can spend hundreds of dollars on skin care but if you aren’t hydrating your insides, you’ll see it in your face.
I've long been a fan of Dr Bronner's castile soap. Currently working on a big bottle of hemp tea tree.
Six years ago I had five excisions on the face and an incision near one eye (all negative, mostly things my mother was prone to) and each follow up my plastic surgeon says I make him look good. The melanocytes are coming back very slowly.
I am restricted by my husband’s sensitivity to scent. I have found the Korean cosmetics and face products really great for that reason. CosRX is my go to brand for most stuff.
Finding things that aren't scented seems fucking impossible sometimes.
Tell me about it!!!! Sometimes I wish the fungus that got into my husband’s nose and partially disabled his smelling ability would come back. I actually wore light perfume sometimes and he didn’t know. It also made me aware that it is partially psychological about his inability to tolerate any kind of scent (because the “scent” didn’t give him asthma when he couldn’t smell it). He has a genuine allergy to pollen…so the scent of flowers is really upsetting to him.
I am routinely mistaken for someone 10-15 years younger. I keep a minimalist routine- I slap on a good retinol serum at night (currently using Cerave Skin Renewing, $18 most places), I slap on a good SPF 55 in the morning (Neutrogena Ultra Sheer, $10 almost anywhere) and I use a light moisturizer before the sun screen but after the retinol (Clinique Dramatically Different aka "yellow lotion" - about $15-20 anywhere if you can find it on sale.)
I use cheaper SPF 50 on the rest of my body, and also the purple Cerave eye renewal ($15 most places.)
My favorite "skinfluencer" (to use that awful term) is Lab Muffin Beauty Science out of Australia. She has a PhD in chemistry and worked in shampoo formulations for a while. She does a great job debunking bad beauty science and explaining why we don't need to be afraid of most of chemicals used in our products these days, because a century of improved testing and the abandonment of many bad practices and dangerous ingredients has made the mid grade stuff on the shelves safe and quite effective.
Just don't ever use any stuff that is UNLABELED - there was a recent Chubby Emu video about a woman who ended up with severe mercury poisoning because of the skin lightening cream she was sold on the black market.
Bonus minimalist makeup routine, for when I'm going out drinking or someplace where I need to be fancy. This whole mess takes me under five minutes.
- Fresh application of lotion base (good old yellow lotion)
- Benefit Pore Professional, original, on the T-zone. I don't have severe acne scarring or bad wrinkles, but I do have a few deeper pores, and this stops foundation from settling into them.
- If I'm going for a heavy night of drinking or I'm having a bad skin day, I'll brush on a light dusting of Tint d'oil from Lancôme. They're the only foundation that comes in my stupidly pale shade AND can be applied with a brush despite being a liquid. Even, very light light coverage, only on the bits of my face that really need it.
- Tightline eyeliner. Currently using a liquid dark brown from Nyx. I have double hooded eyes that turn up making trendy extended lined eyes impossible, but a tight line works fine. No mascara.... it'll just melt the first time I cry from laughing too hard.
- Magic hyper shift loose powder from Surreal Makeup on the eyes. I like "Illusion" for a professional look and "Autumn Nights" for fancy times.. You get eye looks that would take an Instagram a good five minutes ... in a single jar of powder and about ten seconds. Impossible to mess up putting on, and impossible to mess up while wearing. I'm never going back to single shade eyeshadow.
- I usually don't bother much with blush but if it's a special occasion I'll rub in some random berry cream stuff from Clinique I got from a bonus time bag. It's probably time to replace it, but I use it so rarely it feels kind of wasteful to throw away an almost full tube and buy something new.
- No lipstick. I live and die by Purestick peppermint chapstick. I'm allergic to lanolin so most chapsticks are right out, but that particular brand doesn't have lanolin so I'm saved!
Fuck Secret telling women that we stink. And not actually taking phone calls from women who do not like being told that we stink.
That's pretty much what I got on the skincare thing.
Well, I guess I'll be spending my first PAYCHECK IN A YEAR on a lot of this. My skincare isn't horrible, but again, 61 and counting. I got a neck lift and a lower lid blepheroplasty in early 2020, no regrets.
I've been considering a neck lift. I have chicken neck wattle due to weight loss hollowing out my double chin and leaving saggy skin in its place. How long was the recovery time?
For the really obvious stuff, about a week. For swelling and back to mostly normal, about a month. Then gradually better. I've got neck wattles again (not as much) but I don't have the face sag (which was actually uncomfortable for me). The down side is a bit of that 'pulled' look from certain angles and I did lose a bit of feeling on my ears from a little nerve damage (very common). If you're gonna have work done, this and the lower lids doesn't make you look freakish at all.
That "beatnik" girl's beautiful, and looks a little like Audrey Hepburn...if they just left her hair kind of loose she would have looked perfect and not older.
Though I have to agree with the "you need height in your hair" for round faces--since I look like a candied apple, I miss the days of "big hair"...
It's one of those things--if you're 20, actually you are just beautiful no matter what. No exceptions. You can do anything and you're still gorgeous. Just put on sunscreen, darling beautiful ones, and make sure to smile more than you frown, because 50+ comes sooner than you think.
Nothing wrong with 50+!!! I like Bobby Brown’s philosophy …it is not to look “young” but to look just look “good”. If you have a light in your eyes and an ebullient spirit you are gorgeous to me!!!
Nothing at all wrong with it! It's just that if you spend the previous 50 years hating and scowling nothing's going to "fix" it. I'm with you--what's free and powerful is working to keep a happy, laughter-filled, positive, loving spirit, and the rest will follow (but also wear sunscreen).
That's why Betty White aged so beautifully, I think. The enthusiasm for life shone through until the end.
It's so powerful to seem like you have a sense of humor and curiosity! She was beautiful to the very end because she seemed happy to be here.
It is only in the last few years that I have started taking care of my face. I have always lotioned my body but I seem to have developed very dry legs and arms. I use CeraVe everything. The Neutrogena hydrating face stuff made my skin oily. I use Aquaphor on my lips. My hair care is more expensive because of the pink hair. I use Ouai oil to keep the moisture in.
Aquaphor is the GOAT for chapped skin - lips, heels, winter hands.
It's a jam, I use it for everything.
I am completely ignorant to all things skincare related. I am also fortunate to be approaching 40 and still have the skin of someone in their early 20s. Guess there were some good genes in my family after all.
What would you recommend for an oily skinned 15 year old who is not happy about teenage acne and the associated bullying from her peers? Particularly one who is on a limited budget?
Asking for Cakes Jr.
I was blessed to not have acne as a teen, just occasional pimples. As Robyn says below, I went way overboard trying to prevent pimples, overdrying my skin. For the longest time, I bought products for dry skin. It was a never ending cycle until I stopped.
That was ok until I turned 34 with the onset of Adult Acne. All of a sudden, I had pizza face. I was able to find a black dermatologist who specialized in problems specific to black skin, like keloids. My father had keloids and you do not want those bad boys on your face. She immediately put me on antibiotics to kill the infections. That was a 3 month course. Then she prescribed Retin-A in 0.1% strength, a cream that contains prescription strength retinoids. specifically tretinoin. It's used in the topical treatment of acne and to reduce wrinkles. Eventually, we cut back to 0.05% and the 0.05% in the winter and 0.1% in the summer.
Once, years later when I needed to refill the prescription, I decided to stop using Retin-A, just to see what would happen. And nothing did. I still didn't have acne. Just the occasional pimple, which i would treat with salicylic acid, the same chemicals that are in aspirin.
Now, I would suggest that she use Differin for acne. It's a over the counter retinoid that used to be prescription. It can be used with benzoyl peroxide to dry up existing pustules and to prevent new ones.
Here's more sciencey information:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Adapalene
If she doesn't respond to this home treatment, then it's time to see a doctor.
She also needs to be practicing good hygiene. Wash her face in the morning and before going to bed. And after exercising. Use a mild facial cleanser and toner. If she's using makeup to try to cover up the acne, stop. It only aggravates acne and looks ridiculous IMHO. Mascara and lip stuff is ok. And get a facial moisturizer with at least SPF30. YOu can get it oil-free. I liked Neutrogena until I switched to Oil of Olay because old and wrinkle prevention.
I hope this helps from a survivor. Now let's see what Penn and Teller have to say about acne:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WDUIeCEZ23E
As someone who until I started hitting menopause had very oily skin, and at 15 you could have drilled for oil in my face, good quality witch hazel worked best for me. My preferred brand is Dr. Thayer. They've started bringing out a full skin care line, that I would have killed for back in the day. I currently use their daily facial cleanser and lavender witch hazel as a toner, quick wipe down in a pinch refresher. It's about $10 for 8 ounces.
So, first of all — don't overdo it on the exfoliating or anything that dries skin out. That can often have the opposite effect and cause skin to produce more oil to make up for it. The Glow Recipe Watermelon toner I mentioned is good because of the BHA/PHA in it, but it is quite expensive. Some by Mi is an affordable alternative that I know a lot of people with acne issues really like (though apparently it's one of those that will break you out before it clears you up)
https://www.amazon.com/SOME-MI-Sensitive-Exfoliating-Oiliness/dp/B07BYJF7L7?source=ps-sl-shoppingads-lpcontext&ref_=fplfs&psc=1&smid=A23RHLBEN9FBHR
Products with salicylic acid, snail mucin, tiger grass (which is calming), cica, niacinamide, green tea, soothing clay masks can all be helpful.
Double cleansing with mild, gentle products (no fragrances) is also always a good idea. Would stick to the Korean stuff because American products can be really harsh.
The COSRX blemish cream is also quite good.
https://www.skincupid.us/products/cosrx-centella-blemish-cream-30g?_pos=1&_sid=fd3c7e152&_ss=r&shpxid=688c4862-b498-4132-8e66-34091d2ff275
For excess oil, blotting papers are a good, for individual zits, hydrocolloid stickers (get them at Marshalls, WAY less expensive). And again, SPF is extra important to prevent scarring.
I'll have a look for UK equivalents.
Oh! All of those products are available in the UK. BUT my favorite skincare vlogger is British and he might have some good tips about products there on his YouTube (honestly, he and his brother who does makeup videos do know a lot, but also they just have very soothing voices and I will listen to them talk about anything).
https://www.youtube.com/@JamesWelsh
I love them!!
As someone who until I started hitting menopause had very oily skin, especially as a teenager I found a better quantity witch hazel worked for me. My preferred brand is Dr.Thayer. They've started bringing out an entire skin care line, and I use their pH Balancing Daily Cleanser. Their stuff is pretty reasonable, around $10 per 8 ounces.