ABC News Too Late To Get In On Barack Obama's Infomercial

Tomorrow night at 8pm on the teevee Barack Obama will give a LIVE Ginsu Knife demonstration and then show how Proactiv cleared up his terrible pustulent acne so that he could be president. That is his "closing argument!" BUT! You poor slobs who only get the ABC on your televisions will be out of luck, because ABC programming goons dicked around too long to accept Obama's offer of a gazillion dollars in exchange for 30 minutes of air time. Too bad for you. For the rest of the nation, your Wonkette editors will helpfully liveblog whatever the hell is on ABC, some show about dead people?, while the Hopey hawks his cheap "change 'n' Marxism" Bedazzler on every other channel ever invented.

Ha ha, did none of that make any sense? That's because THIS is the real story:

ABC finally offered Barack Obama's camp the 8 p.m. half-hour in its Wednesday lineup for his campaign-related program -- which will air at that time on the other major broadcast networks.

But, in an ironic twist, the Democratic presidential candidate's campaign passed on ABC's offer, saying it has allocated the funds elsewhere.

"We were in discussion with the Obama campaign and had offered them the half-hour, but at this point that's not happening and 'Pushing Daisies' will air in its regular time slot," an ABC spokesman told The TV Column yesterday.

You snooze you lose, ABC! When Oprah Winfrey becomes Chief Secretary of the Ministry of Socialist Television Propaganda under Permanent Diktator Hussein "Barack" Obama, you will show nothing but reruns ofSmall Wonder,all day long.

 ABC Jumps Too Late On Obama's 'Buy' [Washington Post]