Abomination of Nature Liz Cheney Wants To Be In The Senate, Of Course

Just as you people finish mourning the death of one hateful twat, we show up to tell you about the possible resurrection of another. We are speaking of diseased lizard scrotum Elizabeth Cheney, who is remarkably only the second-most unhinged dipshit to ever get near her mother’s vagina (assuming her conception was natural and ol’ Dick did not impregnate his bride by pointing at her and using the dark side of the Force, Vader style).

Take it away, Tucker Carlson’s Online Void Where Human Thought Goes to Die:  

A source close to the politically active daughter of Vice President Dick Cheney tells The Daily Caller that she is still seriously considering running.

Terrific. If there is one thing the Senate lacks, it is a retrograde Tea Party asshole who has called Obama “the most radical president ever” and spent the early days of his administration concern-trolling the president’s refusal “to stand up for America” and also for abandoning Czechoslovakia, which actually ceased to exist in 1992.

There might be one drawback in Liz’s plan, and that is the current Republican Senator Mike Enzi, who says he is running again in 2014. Enzi is relatively popular in Wyoming. He won his last election with over three-quarters of the vote, and he consistently votes the conservative hard line. Would that be enough to overcome the daughter of the Dark Lord himself? Will Enzi visit the home of Cheney Sr. for a little chat and leave hours later weeping and speaking gibberish and crossing himself, followed by his office sending out a press release announcing his retirement to a sanitarium in Grand Forks? Or will Liz sit this one out, biding her time, knowing that thanks to the deal her family has made with Cthulu and the Old Ones, she is now Eternal, the Destroyer of Worlds, and has centuries to bring about her evil plans?

Should be a fun 2014 election cycle!

[ Daily Caller ]