And The Sharks Had Tears In Their Eyes And They Said ‘Sir, Sir’
And The Sharks Had Tears In Their Eyes And They Said ‘Sir, Sir’
Think he'll tell this story at the debate?
Donald Trump told his story about sharks and electric boats again this weekend, because he physically can’t stop himself from telling it. The Biden campaign tweeted this video, because of course they did.
Really savor this transcript if you haven’t yet.
“Now they’ll say all these stories are terrible. Well, these stories have, you know, you heard my story in the boat with the shark, right? I got killed on that.
“They thought I was rambling. I’m not rambling. They wanna make boats. And they are demanding that they be battery-operated. All electric. And I was in South Carolina at this wonderful family boat yard.
“Big yard, make a lot of boats, you know, like fishing boats from 17 to like 30 feet.
“And I said, ‘How’s everything going?’ And they said, ‘No good. They want us to go all electric. I said well would that work? No because it’s so heavy, we can’t get the boat to float. The battery is so heavy.’
“So then I start talking about asking questions. You know, I have an, I had an uncle who was a great professor at MIT for many years, long, I think the longest tenure ever. Very smart, had three different degrees and you know, so I have an aptitude for things.
“You know, there is such a thing as an aptitude. I said, ‘Well, what would happen if this boat is so heavy and started to sink and you’re on the top of the boat? Do you get electrocuted or not?’
“In other words, the boat is going down and you’re on the top, will the electric currents flow through the water and wipe you out? And let’s say there’s a shark about ten yards over there.
“Would I have to immediately abandon or could I ride the electric down and he said, ‘Sir, nobody’s ever asked us that question. But sir, I don’t know.’ I said, ‘Well, I want to know because I guarantee you one thing, I don’t care what happens.’
“I’m staying with the electric, I’m not getting over with it. So I tell that story. You know, it’s just fun! And the fake news they go, he told this crazy story with electric. It’s actually not crazy. It’s sort of a smart story, right?
“Sort of like, you know, it’s like the snake, it’s a smart when you, you figure what you’re leaving in, right? You’re bringing it in the, you know, the snake, right?
“The snake and the snake. I tell that and they do the same thing.”
It’s sort of a smart story, because he has an aptitude.
Trump also this weekend floated an idea for a migrants-only fighting league. OH AND AND AND he said that if he took his shirt off, “you’d see a beautiful, beautiful person. But you’d see wounds all over, all over me. I have taken a lot of wounds, I can tell you.”
The crowd cheered, for dumpy Jesus.
That debate later this week should be run, we reckon.
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>You know, I have an, I had an uncle who was a great professor at MIT for many years, long, I think the longest tenure ever. Very smart, had three different degrees and you know, so I have an aptitude for things.
A few months before he died, my grandfather reminded us that he started at MIT when he was 16. Then he told us what year it was he started at MIT, except he told us three different years.
A month later he was diagnosed with Alzheimer's.
"Very smart, had three different degrees and you know, so I have an aptitude for things."
So if my uncle was a brain surgeon, I would be qualified to operate on trump's brain. If I could find it.