26 Comments

I liked "yet another baking soda volcano of teenage suffering has had the vinegar of the internet dumped on it in this science fair of hell that is high-school" myself.

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I have a promising past. Does that count?

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Holy crap, you're right. I still use my Cafe Utne password and that's got to be pre-1997.

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"and I’m like :( "

Harrrrumph! That's right, I said HARRRRRUMPH!

Welcome to the Monkey House kid.

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And are still thinking up today?!?!!!

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Perfection, no?

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As good an excuse as any to link to <a href="http:\/\/youtu.be\/54yBV6i0IqA" target="_blank">The Vienna Sausage Choir</a>.

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Happiness. Happiness. Hap-piness. Haa-piness. Haaaa-penis! There! I said it!

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He's only mostly dead.

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That quote (or rather, the original it was based on) is now 20 years old. Five years older than Kid Zoom.

This has been your depressing realization for today.

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Off topic but Bieber has had his monkey confiscated. <a href="http://www.tmz.com/2013/03/..." target="_blank">" rel="nofollow noopener" title="http://www.tmz.com/2013/03/30/justin-bieber-monke...">http://www.tmz.com/2013/03/...

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must be one of those snap chat jokes

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"How'd ya learn the word "penis" in Idaho?'

probably from Larry Craig

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Kid, you get more and more AWESOME.

This reflects so well on your snarky dad that it'll irritate the crap out of you for awhile, but whtevs.

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No, that was Lindsey Graham's twitter feed.

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"Smithers, who is that firebrand?" "Uh, that's Kid Zoom, one of your drones from Sector 7-G." "Kid Zoom, eh? I like the cut of his jib!"

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