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Anonymous Journo Hated Sex With You

Classy porn joint Nerve has their Washington Issue up. Our favorite piece is an anonymous journo describing, in painful detail, the depressing mating rituals of Washington. No bitching from us -- it's a very entertaining and accurate piece.
Speaking of which, Foley has provided Washington with its first sex scandal in a long time, and it's the perfect one for the city. It reminds you that men in Washington just really don't like girls, and that they'd much rather talk about sex than have it.
So we'll just put it to you: who's the author? We'll accept all guesses and hold it to a poll later this week.