Lt. Col. Terrence Lakin, the Army doctor who went on YouTube to brag about how he was not going to report for deployment to Afghanistan because Barack Obama did not personally come over to his house and provide THE BIRTH CERTIFICATE, has pled guilty to doing this very thing. But he has not pled guilty to a second count, missing his flight to Afghanistan -- probably because airplanes don't exist either. (If they do, why didn't the airplane send him a certificate that says it was manufactured and exists, huh?) Anyway, this man faces up to 18 months in prison, but by the time he's sentenced, the Kenyans will have sold all white Americans off to slavery in the communist knowledge-economy factories anyway.
Preferably the kind of prison buttsecks where a little light beating may be substituted in lieu of lubricant.
Is "crack attorney" a legal speciality, like family law or wills & estates?
This guy is an army doctor...I'll bet he's had plenty of experience with unusual discharges.
One doesn't necessarily preclude the other.
I'm thinking of a scene from Harold and Kumar Escape from Guantanamo Bay right before they escape.