Arnold to Solve Looming Maria Problem

Our embedded Gay Operative sent us this email last night.

Dear Wonkette,

The gays are spreading a big rumor today that Arnold Schwarzenegger and Maria are getting divorced tomorrow. I don't know why. And I don't know which gay sect started it. But it's traveling around like wildfire--"Divorce to be announced at noon!" What gives, gays? So inscrutable in their agendas. Also they're saying something about Barry Osama and his past but I didn't catch it and David Axelrod always gives the gas face when you start talking about how once you go Barack etc.

Cordially,

Gay Operative #42

If this is true, Governor Wolfcastle and his Kennedy have already been divorced for a half-hour already! We aren't sure -- there's nothing about it on the internet yet and we refuse to watch MSNBC. Unless the Gays mean noonPacifictime, which is, what, 9 or 10 at night over here, isn't it? No one on the eastern seaboard will be sober enough to care by then.