Leonard Pinth-Garnell was, sadly, unavailable. [Update: Looks like we were hornswoggled by the Poet Lariat! See end of post -- Dok] Greetings, Culture Vultures, Poetasters, rotten vegetables vendors, would-be Vogons, and of course Paula Nancy Millstone Jennings. The emergence (eruption? extrusion?) of that
At one point, somebody was saying Trump was going to author some poem, kind of like a Berdimuhamedov wannabee. Given Trump's logorrheic syntax, it called to mind Martin Mull's formulation of the "puddle of consciousness" lyrical style. I have no poem to offer, but I propose the title "Silver Spoon River Anthology".
There once was a phony named TrumpWho wore on his head a strange clump.It happened they said, while a bird on his headWent to nest, but instead took a dump.
How did we come to this cold, cold, place?This accidental destination.This broken promise.
How did we forget this terrible sensation? Aching cold that invades the pulp of tooth, the marrow of boneThere is blame here…deep in the blood, thick and slow.
Resentment and bitterness rein in frozen hell, pervasive, ubiquitous, unacknowledged.the air we breath, the water in which we swim.
We are convinced that we are stronglacking the courage to leave.We must be strong or we would surely goWe must be brave or we would surely go.
What does it mean to prevail? What is the meaning of losswhen warmth is gone from memory?What is the meaning of memory when it is gone?
I met a traveller from an antique landWho said: “Two stubby, armless hands of stoneLie in the desert . . . Near them, on the sand,Half sunk, a shattered visage lies, whose scowl,And pout, and sneer of white male privilegeTell that its sculptor well those passions readThough not reimbursed, stamped on these lifeless things,The hand that mocked them, paid in "exposure bucks":And on the Android these words appear:
Donald J. Trump ✔ @realDonaldTrumpLying Hillary is the worst, a total loser! She said I couldn't build a wall, but here it is! She should apologize! Sad!
7:24 PM - 23 May 2019 68 Retweets 45 likes
Nothing beside remains. Round the decayOf that colossal wreck, boundless and bareThe lone and level sands stretch far away.”
There once was a con man named Trump,If you voted for him you're a chump.While in Russia, you seeHe got hookers to pee,And The Donald cried, "Oh, what a dump!"
It's true, isn't it? And yes, you really do see those three very, very different ships. The language, the sounds of the words. My new favorite word is going to be quinquireme. A gorgeous poem. Glad you appreciated it! And yes, we do still have poetry....
§ The Spiders from Mars were far and away Bowie's best backing band. § A polecat is a non-domesticated ferret. It's polygamous & unrelated to a cat. § Drumpf is a name that comes from Kallstadt, Germany, the ancestral home of Domhnall's paternal line. Kallstadt is located about 85 miles (or 136 kilometers, for those backwards enough not to use the greatest system of measurement in the entire world) away from Natzweiler-Struthof, a concentration camp where it is estimated that 22,000 prisoners were murdered. § I touched myself repeatedly while writing the stanza about Ivanka.
Donald Trump, you're such a champ;you're the sump of Jafar's lamp;if I could, I'd take a dumpon the hood of your Rolls-Royce;that way they would all rejoicewhen you paid those hookers twice;
Tiny hands you maybe havebut your tan makes pumpkins madand your hair's a hologram;people stare because they hateand they wish they looked so great,like a fish pimped out to date;
Every foe will be made small— :Mexico will buy that wall,China's trade will take a bow,Europe's state will crack and die,Isis will be crucified,Russia's mill wheels all untied;
Allah weeps to know that nowour land sleeps safe from his plow:all his slaves and wolfish sheepdig their graves and curse your crownwhile down south they all wear frowns since you're drought to Chinatown;
Losers whine you won less votesbut they'll find that's all she wrote;—Wicked Hill is far behindthat evil called Time's advance,so kick back, enjoy finance—no attack can break your lance;
All those folks you promised jobsnow will know that you're no sod—factories that long agocrossed the seas will soon back-flock;—magic elves with magic socksshall use spells, reverse the clock;
Though you've gone bankrupt six timesyou're no con, for it's no crimeto be bad at eating prawnonce you've had calamari,lobster bisque & Persian tea,—there's no risk when money's free;
Is it true that'd you'd have sexwith your boo, Ivanka-Rex?I'm not blind since I would too,for I find that though I'm notquite inclined to what she's got,she's so fine it can't be fought;
Sure, you've said you've grabbed them bywhere there's red when Kelly pries,yet that's fair, no need to dread— :no one cares what peasants claim;if they let men of great famegrope them wet, they are to blame;
Goodbye, Drumpf, you hero-god;—don't mind grumps & mugwump clodscalling names— : they're stupid chumpslacking brains to see your staror perceive how great you areor receive your wisdom, Tsar.
At one point, somebody was saying Trump was going to author some poem, kind of like a Berdimuhamedov wannabee. Given Trump's logorrheic syntax, it called to mind Martin Mull's formulation of the "puddle of consciousness" lyrical style. I have no poem to offer, but I propose the title "Silver Spoon River Anthology".
There once was a phony named TrumpWho wore on his head a strange clump.It happened they said, while a bird on his headWent to nest, but instead took a dump.
THIS COLD,COLD, PLACE
How did we come to this cold, cold, place?This accidental destination.This broken promise.
How did we forget this terrible sensation? Aching cold that invades the pulp of tooth, the marrow of boneThere is blame here…deep in the blood, thick and slow.
Resentment and bitterness rein in frozen hell, pervasive, ubiquitous, unacknowledged.the air we breath, the water in which we swim.
We are convinced that we are stronglacking the courage to leave.We must be strong or we would surely goWe must be brave or we would surely go.
What does it mean to prevail? What is the meaning of losswhen warmth is gone from memory?What is the meaning of memory when it is gone?
Sorry, it's the best I've got:
There once was a fake billionaireWho had very strange orange hairHe managed to winBy a slender marginSo thirty million folks lose healthcare
Oh, that Kurt Vonnegut were here:
"We were walking through the park,A-goosing statues in the dark.If Sherman's horse can take it, So can you."
Today we are all Sherman's horse.
I met a traveller from an antique landWho said: “Two stubby, armless hands of stoneLie in the desert . . . Near them, on the sand,Half sunk, a shattered visage lies, whose scowl,And pout, and sneer of white male privilegeTell that its sculptor well those passions readThough not reimbursed, stamped on these lifeless things,The hand that mocked them, paid in "exposure bucks":And on the Android these words appear:
Donald J. Trump ✔ @realDonaldTrumpLying Hillary is the worst, a total loser! She said I couldn't build a wall, but here it is! She should apologize! Sad!
7:24 PM - 23 May 2019 68 Retweets 45 likes
Nothing beside remains. Round the decayOf that colossal wreck, boundless and bareThe lone and level sands stretch far away.”
There once was a man from SetauketWho one day up and said fuck itFor the presidency I'll runAnd if ever I wonThe nation you'll tote home in a bucket.
There once was a con man named Trump,If you voted for him you're a chump.While in Russia, you seeHe got hookers to pee,And The Donald cried, "Oh, what a dump!"
A Poe poem for a Poe ...
It's true, isn't it? And yes, you really do see those three very, very different ships. The language, the sounds of the words. My new favorite word is going to be quinquireme. A gorgeous poem. Glad you appreciated it! And yes, we do still have poetry....
That is VERY nice!
That is genius. Good work!
Peeing-Bro of the Dumbballs
by G. M. H. Thompson© G. M. H. Thompson, all rights reserved
Author's notes:
§ The Spiders from Mars were far and away Bowie's best backing band. § A polecat is a non-domesticated ferret. It's polygamous & unrelated to a cat. § Drumpf is a name that comes from Kallstadt, Germany, the ancestral home of Domhnall's paternal line. Kallstadt is located about 85 miles (or 136 kilometers, for those backwards enough not to use the greatest system of measurement in the entire world) away from Natzweiler-Struthof, a concentration camp where it is estimated that 22,000 prisoners were murdered. § I touched myself repeatedly while writing the stanza about Ivanka.
Donald Trump, you're such a champ;you're the sump of Jafar's lamp;if I could, I'd take a dumpon the hood of your Rolls-Royce;that way they would all rejoicewhen you paid those hookers twice;
Tiny hands you maybe havebut your tan makes pumpkins madand your hair's a hologram;people stare because they hateand they wish they looked so great,like a fish pimped out to date;
Every foe will be made small— :Mexico will buy that wall,China's trade will take a bow,Europe's state will crack and die,Isis will be crucified,Russia's mill wheels all untied;
Allah weeps to know that nowour land sleeps safe from his plow:all his slaves and wolfish sheepdig their graves and curse your crownwhile down south they all wear frowns since you're drought to Chinatown;
Losers whine you won less votesbut they'll find that's all she wrote;—Wicked Hill is far behindthat evil called Time's advance,so kick back, enjoy finance—no attack can break your lance;
All those folks you promised jobsnow will know that you're no sod—factories that long agocrossed the seas will soon back-flock;—magic elves with magic socksshall use spells, reverse the clock;
Though you've gone bankrupt six timesyou're no con, for it's no crimeto be bad at eating prawnonce you've had calamari,lobster bisque & Persian tea,—there's no risk when money's free;
Is it true that'd you'd have sexwith your boo, Ivanka-Rex?I'm not blind since I would too,for I find that though I'm notquite inclined to what she's got,she's so fine it can't be fought;
Sure, you've said you've grabbed them bywhere there's red when Kelly pries,yet that's fair, no need to dread— :no one cares what peasants claim;if they let men of great famegrope them wet, they are to blame;
Goodbye, Drumpf, you hero-god;—don't mind grumps & mugwump clodscalling names— : they're stupid chumpslacking brains to see your staror perceive how great you areor receive your wisdom, Tsar.
There's nothing more heinous than a prolapsed anus with orange hair around the rim.
Oh my gosh. I think I'm in love.
An old friend leavingA new friend coming maybe?No - I say good bye