354 Comments
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Mary O'Shegetz's avatar

Sadly what these voting numbers say more than anything else is that people who would otherwise vote for a Democratic candidate---independents, democrats, and the two or three moderate Republicans--could not bring themselves to vote for a woman of color for president.

Pope Scipio Newburyporticus's avatar

Meh. She spent her whole campaign chasing Lynn Cheney.

Lucius's avatar

I initially misread the title as "Mike johnson goes Goethe". I don't know how that would work, but it would probably be a step up.

Why So Lugubrious?'s avatar

It pains me to say it, truly, but there are likely a number of Democrats "fired up" this time because it's easier to get "fired up" when your candidate isn't a black woman.

Plenty of Democrats only gonna vote for Wipipo.

Lucius's avatar

Yup. As the last election taught us.😣

Satanic Pancake's avatar

Don't go goth, Johnson, go into the corn field.

Rachel Baldes's avatar

Republicans are running unopposed in 40% of Kentucky's state legislature races. Independents can't vote in primaries in the state. So it's a safe guess that the most Maga of each county will win the primary and then go on vacation until the general election where they'll win by default. Then they'll start drafting laws. My mom moved me here from Vermont as a toddler, couldn't she just have not?

lordpnut's avatar

Force a "tae kwon dodo" moment where they're treeing each other with coon dogs in the primary.

Rachel Baldes's avatar

The Andy Barr ad Wonkette wrote about isn't even the dumbest Andy Barr ad. It's maybe the more racist ad but not by much. The problem is being adjacent to armed idiots seems unsafe, how do I get them firing at each other from a distance?

lordpnut's avatar

Try some graffiti telling them that Sid the sloth is trying to steal their melon?

lordpnut's avatar

Fuck yeah! The ahnk really sells that fucker!

Sojourner44's avatar

Poor bastards. They can't seem to get it that the more people understand their agenda, the more they despise them.

NatalyaResists's avatar

HAHAHAHAHAHA!!! NO TARIFFS! LOL!

lordpnut's avatar

"You're all... tariffs."

- Billy Hayes MIDNIGHT EXPRESS (ish)

Birb-General of the US's avatar

Hey! Hey! Now that we don't have The Tariffs can we finally tax the rich again to get a more balanced budget and reduce the deficit, and pay for nice things?

jaspersdad's avatar

Imagine being so fucking stupid that even the most complicit Supreme Court you can have rules against you.

Menotsure's avatar

The tariffs decision will not do a thing to help the small businesses forced to shut down as a result of not being able to absorb the tariffs in the same way as the massive chains.

Michael's avatar

And there's no guarantee Trump's brigades of lawyers won't find a workaround not involving Article III powers.

Or he may provoke a constitutional crisis by ignoring the Court though this seems unlikely.

Bagels of Doom's avatar

Ugh! It's just going to be JD and Mikey fighting over the eyeliner, isn't it?

Rocket Cat's avatar

Someone needs to call 911 to have Fetterman removed from Trump’s mushroom.

No Quid Bro Code's avatar

Hey, remember how he was the "progressive standing up against the Corporate Democrat Connor Lamb?" Pepperidge Farms remembers.

Birb-General of the US's avatar

I think the stroke killed the progressive lobe of his brain.

Aquaman, Real Estate Investor.'s avatar

He was always a reactionary racist.

gnomemansanisland's avatar

Need the jaws of life for that job.

Richard S's avatar

Those percentage points are nice, but do we have any information on turnout numbers?

Aquaman, Real Estate Investor.'s avatar

Yes.

GOP turnout is cratering, that's the swing.

No Quid Bro Code's avatar

Kavanaugh, Alito and Thomas, who wouldn't let Biden take a tinkle unless Congress expressly allowed it, say changing tax rates on imports to whatever Donnie wakes up feeling like today is not a "major question" and statutes can be read expansively to let [Republican] presidents do what they want.

Tony Kennedy, author of Citizens United, can go fuck himself for giving his seat to Kegs.

EyeQueue's avatar

They're fascists.

Shallow state's avatar

Jeez, what a country! Their convicted felon, adjudicated rapist, openly corrupt, dementia rambling, internationally despised, pedophilia adjacent (at least) party leader is not going to be on the ballot and that's going to *depress* republican turnout.

No Quid Bro Code's avatar

Racism is a helluva drug.