436 Comments

Maybe vagina dentata.

Expand full comment

So, if a banana is like a mans penis, it will bruise and die soon?

Expand full comment

Canteloupe (aka Rockmelon). That is all.

Expand full comment

Wise oranges are too smart to let themselves be caught by just anybody.

https://uploads.disquscdn.c...

Expand full comment

The only thing Africa needs from us is a fair price for all the mineral wealth we stole and continue to steal from it.

Expand full comment

Wait. Whaaaaaat?

Expand full comment

Good dsylexic doG the dumbification of America Murica has been remarkably successful.

Expand full comment

And only drink pure grain alcohol and rain water.

Expand full comment

Is the message essentially that if you're going to be an orange, at least don't be a cheap one?

https://www.youtube.com/wat...

Expand full comment

And then there's that line about why buy a cow when you can get milk for free.

I can identify. Many a woman has bought a pig when all she wanted was a tasty sausage.

Expand full comment

Which explains the 72 virgins.

Expand full comment

It's an antichoice companion piece to the odd notion that if you eat meat your stomach is a "graveyard."

I'm in my late 60s so my mom's meatloaf must be the consistency of particle board by now.

Expand full comment

And let's not get started on penguins, what with male incubating, de facto prostitution and all.

Expand full comment

Nice deal, if you don't have to 'pay protection.'

Expand full comment

Or maybe one too many woman pointed and laughed?

Expand full comment

More like the classic insanity of keeping up with the Changs.

Expand full comment