Imagine Speaker of the House Ben Carson. And try not to die laughing. Another exciting installment in the Choose Your Own Adventure series that is Ben Carson's fascinating whoa-if-true (but probably not true) life story! According to reliable source Ben Carson, in 2014 -- long before Republicans forced Speaker John Boehner to quit his job, leaving the Grand Ol' Party in a disarrayed panicked puddle of
This reminds me of that time Ben Carson saved the children of Earth from the Giant Space Kangaroo.It was on the Australian news, you might not have heard of it.
"several members that thought I’d fit the bill," you mean like the several American voters who kept urging him to run for President cause he was all still spine and whatnot? This guy takes others sycophancy too seriously.
Hey Ben, we really feel you are the only man that can inhabit and set the stage for life on Mars, so, have at it man.
No, actually, the way it works is that in Ben's mind, several survivors of the plane have told him that they think he would have also too bailed them out of a mortal plane crash, if only he'd be a airline pilot now.
Scene: Washungton DC, Stars N' Stripes N' Pecs Gym. Two men, running on neighboring treadmill machines breathe heavily and attempt light conversation. Both men are running backwards, in a skipping motion. One wears a pink tutu. The other is in full King Tut costume and eating a bucket of fried chicken. Both appear angry and confused. Man 1: "Ben, wanna be Speaker?"Man 2: "No, you want that guy over there." points to backwards-hat-wearing doofus in the corner, staring at himself in the mirror and kissing his biceps as he does arm curlsBoth men giggle uncontrollably as the curtain falls. End Scene.
At first I wondered if they wanted him because then they could point to him and be all "See, we're not racists, we supported a black Speaker" Then I remembered that the right-wing tends to be all "hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah fuck him, he's not white enough"
This reminds me of that time Ben Carson saved the children of Earth from the Giant Space Kangaroo.It was on the Australian news, you might not have heard of it.
"several members that thought I’d fit the bill," you mean like the several American voters who kept urging him to run for President cause he was all still spine and whatnot? This guy takes others sycophancy too seriously.
Hey Ben, we really feel you are the only man that can inhabit and set the stage for life on Mars, so, have at it man.
No, actually, the way it works is that in Ben's mind, several survivors of the plane have told him that they think he would have also too bailed them out of a mortal plane crash, if only he'd be a airline pilot now.
I'd read it.
Maybe he's trying to do a Patrick McGoohan and got it wrong?
Happy new year to you as well
Me. He definitely can't do me. Ever. STOP ASKING, BEN CARSON!
"They" asked old manthing Cheney too.
What a chilling thought! Reminds me of The Omen Trilogy.
Wait that's not them?
Scene: Washungton DC, Stars N' Stripes N' Pecs Gym. Two men, running on neighboring treadmill machines breathe heavily and attempt light conversation. Both men are running backwards, in a skipping motion. One wears a pink tutu. The other is in full King Tut costume and eating a bucket of fried chicken. Both appear angry and confused. Man 1: "Ben, wanna be Speaker?"Man 2: "No, you want that guy over there." points to backwards-hat-wearing doofus in the corner, staring at himself in the mirror and kissing his biceps as he does arm curlsBoth men giggle uncontrollably as the curtain falls. End Scene.
Sleeper of the House?
OH FUCK YOU BEN CARSON EVER'BODY KNOWS THAT ONLY MAH MAIN MAN LOUIE GOHMERT WAS GETTING KNOB JOBS TO BE SPEAKER AFTER THE BONER COUP!!1!!!
*buh....... lin.....kuh*
At first I wondered if they wanted him because then they could point to him and be all "See, we're not racists, we supported a black Speaker" Then I remembered that the right-wing tends to be all "hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah fuck him, he's not white enough"
Check out the tie on mah main man Louie Gohmert! Shhh... what's the tie saying?...... Preznitial!