432 Comments
founding

That picture up top is my favorite image of Gov. Orc-in-an-ill-fitting-human suit. He looks like he just got goosed with a cattle prod, a scenario that gives me joy and some relief from three-o'clock in the morning bad thoughts about the unconscionable cruelty that goes on in the world without my being able to stop it.

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Don't defame the Orks, they are violent and live only for battle, but they aren't anywhere near as slimy as DeSantis.

WAAHHHHHHGHHHH!!!!!

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Colbert had a photo of him with one of his smiles that looks like he's surprised he can replicate human emotions and said "pictured here realizing that mommy was behind the couch the whole time"...

You probably had to be there...

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Jackie Osantis.

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Not having the "Jackie Onassis" label. Thrift shop Nancy Reagan maybe.

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the postmortems are going to flow like fertilizer runoff into the Everglades from now until whenever Ron finally fucks off back to Tallahassee, taking his smirk, his who-do-you-think-you’re-kidding-Shorty boots, and his bargain-basement Jacqueline Onassis of a wife with him.

just one sick burn after another

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Thank you for the laugh out loud moments in this article, there are several and it was a great start to my Saturday!

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Jan 20·edited Jan 20

Someone tried to give DeSantis a "participation trophy", it's on vid. DeSantis wouldn't accept it, and not politely.

PS The photo of him above is classy.

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I always like to keep it simple and to the point.....fuck that guy.

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This Phil Gramm erasure will not stand.

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Wow, Gary. “…bargain-basement Jacqueline Onassis of a wife with him,” is the nicest compliment you could give a woman who chooses to voluntarily co-exist with Ron DeSantis. It reminds me of the Seinfeld episode with Elaine interviewing for a job, and the woman interviewing her comments that Jackie O had “grace.” Elaine says, “ugh! Such grace! I like to think I have a little grace.” The woman replies, “you can’t have a little grace. You either have grace, or you don’t. And you can’t acquire grace.” Frustrated, Elaine says, “alright, I don’t have grace, I don’t want grace, I don’t even say grace, ok?” Jackie O had it. Ron Boots and his wife are flaky wingnuts subsisting on Trump’s toenail clippings.

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They don't grease for shit either.

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"flaky wingnuts subsisting on Trump’s toenail clippings"

Not my favorite dish at Appleby's.

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It will be amusing to watch ol' Ron get the any-Democratic-elected-official treatment from the media now that the entire world has written him off.

"Trump Bound and Gagged at Trial. DeSantis May Not Recover."

NYT

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Nobody will miss Ron DeBobblehead, but like most evil bastards, he probably still won't go away.

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He'll be grateful to be ketchup boy in the WH kitchen under Trump

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He traded his dignity for those boots .

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founding

Next comes the tell-all books and the legal problems about who gave money to who, how much, why and out of whose pocket.

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I'm holding out for "Fmr FLA Gov caught in love nest with otters."

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founding

musk rats

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Musk rats are my inception, nutria my fate.

I.e., grew up in Michigan, living the dream in Oregon.

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Otter libel!

Maybe mud-eel (this really freaky looking salamander).

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Ta, Gary. I think RDS should return Edgar's skin suit; it doesn't fit him very well.

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Sugar.

I’ve never seen sugar do that.

Give me…sugar. In water.

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founding

And we thought Cruz was Musk's first prototype AI robot.

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founding

I would say I can't wait, but the longer this goes on the sweeter the end will be.

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founding

"Forget it Jake. It's Florida." 50-50 if it ends in tears or gunshots.

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I was really concerned about DeSantis, all the evil of DJT but smarter and in a better package.

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"Smarter." Man, is that a sliding scale.

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And with a willingness to work instead of watching TV all day.

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founding

Oh, our Ron is a busy little bee, beavering away day and night to make Florida the #1 Worst State in the nation, the place where hope and kindness go to die, and to replace Donnie the Cruel as Worse President Ever.

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Republicans now have to learn the lesson that Democrats, thankfully, are finally learning: Just as voters will choose Republican over Republican Lite, they will also choose Trump over Trump Lite.

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founding

Zero personality ended his shot at glory.

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Smarter? That's a pretty low standard.

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I think "less stupid" would be a bit more accurate.

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I'd contest the package part. His cult loves all the stuff we see through, and the MAGA kitsch-o-verse is full of ludicrously idealized images of Dear Leader.

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