You can almost see his thought processes as he descends. "Let's check to see which side is best to go down. Hmm, this one's on the (Hamlet's) right. Better check each one. Right...middle...middle...left...left... Wait, is this a new Konami code? Fuck it, middle all the way to victory!"
Also be aware that pig feces closely resemble the human variety. I know that because in my last neighborhood there was two pigs that got walked and the walkers were not good neighbors...
Actually, the hierarchy of shit is somewhat debatable. Pigshit is pretty nasty, as is that of the long pork. Chickenshit is mainly a problem because of the density in which chickens are raised--you get similarly potent concentrations in penguin rookeries and other nesting areas of sea birds. Snakeshit is pretty nasty, too. And people have been known to succumb to the fumes in when descending into bat caves. I also have it on good authority that Komodo Dragon shit is nasty.
The morale: Shit is like money--if distributed sufficiently widely and in the right concentrations it fosters growth. When concentrated, they both stink.
Why I hate insurance companies with a passion, part 103768: So, the youngest had a medical procedure last month, required us to drive 300 miles to get to a decent hospital and surgeon. It took a while to negotiate everything with insurance, and even after negotiations, they can apparently only approve hospitalization on a day-to-day basis. Before leaving, and on day one of hospitalization/day of surgery: Our surgeon and hospital is in-network, and our out-of-pocket max has been met: Insurance will cover everything at this point. We even have paperwork to that effect. Day 2: surgeon is in-network, hospitalization is out-of-network, but we are only responsible for $25K of the $75K that we now owe for using an out-of-network hospital (although, since this was transmitted via USPS, and we are out of town, we will not actually know any of this for another two weeks). Day 3: Why haven't you moved the patient to a different hospital, and why did you use that one (see previous sentence for when we will actually know any of this)? A month later, insurance company says that since they decided to switch the status from fully covered to out-of-network the day after the surgery, we owe at least $25K, maybe more, and that there is nothing that can be done. This is going to be a fun few days/weeks/months of arguing and submitting appeals and asking for external reviews and reporting Anthem Blue "World's Shittiest Insurance, But As Good As The Rest" Cross to the insurance commissioner and dreaming of ways in which insurance execs could be mulched.
TLDR: Fuck insurance companies, fuck insurance company executives.
I have no choice in insurance carriers through my pension plan. It's BC/BS or nothing, because nobody else wants to insure us outlanders. Well, they don't either, but they haven't found a way out yet.
We had an evangelical family home schooling down the street. They didn't abuse their kids. She was a lovely if somewhat buttoned up person, he got his jollies sexually molesting unconscious patients. It takes all kinds.
As if I hadn't had enough reason to distrust WaPo before. They bring up "rented home" like that proves the person was bad. I'm nearly 40, the only time I felt like I could afford a house was a fixer-upper. Even then I planning to rent out 1/2 - 2/3 of the house to pay the mortgage. Then they say the person "hesitated when officers showed up at her door" like that indicates guilt, I'm a straight-presenting white male and I hesitate when cops order me. Law enforcement takes any action or inaction to mean guilt and the courts go along with it, that alone is reason to pause.
ETA: I think unmonitored homeschooling is ripe for abuse. My parents and grandparents were educators and knew they couldn't properly homeschool me. Instead, they supplemented my education.
I'm just going to rant here for a minute, if you'll bear with me.
How do people do this Christmas thing and still maintain any sense of joy? For me it is just non-stop stress, and this year I am REALLY not feeling it at all. Tree, decor, cards, gifts, cookies, gatherings...For some reason this year I can't wrap my brain around it all, can't make a game plan, can't put an order to it.
I wrote a whole bunch more, but I deleted it, because really, who gives a shit? I hate this time of year. Just gotta slog through, I guess. But I am having real trouble faking that sense of joy.
I find the Christmas thing to be quite simple: Don't decorate, accept that the cats are going to fuck up any tree, so don't get a tree, don't worry about gifts or anything like that, and just focus on maybe having a festive meal on December 24th for the family.
100% support you. It's capitalist/christian nonsense (no offense to christians) concocted to brainwash people to BUY ALL OF THE THINGS. Just ignore it, there's no inherent sense of joy. I'm an orphan and agnostic, so our Xmas is 2 presents for the 2 cats, 1 for me (book) and 3 for my best friend. New Years (the only good "holiday") will be here soon. Agnostic hugs
by not doing it. once our youngest turned 18 we stopped the present thing unless there was something they specifically needed. We dont have a tree and we get takeout for dinner
Simple answer - first, be an atheist or agnostic. Second, have few or no relatives.
Three, have people who tell you that you are a grinch, even as you point out you cannot be a grinxh because you don't believe in Xmas.
Fourth, tell others how you feel and don't apologise for it.
I was in NYC over the weekend and all sorts of things had been X-ised and boy was it SO obnoxious. Especially as it was pouing rain much of the time and no amount of fucking lights was going to make me any happier.
Finally, don't let big business take you for a ride. This is the U S of A, where MONEY is the ONLY THING, and the only Xmas cheer on December 25th will be that of the oligarchs and BIG BUSINESS smilaing that they put one over on the citizens once again in convincing people they MUST do cetain things.
The story about Roman's life and death is haunting me. I experienced abuse and neglect that utterly destroyed my life but it wasn't a fraction of what was done to Roman. The part that is eating at me is the continued failure of adults with regard to the surviving children. Who in their right mind thinks that sending one of the survivors who participated in the abuse to join the military [would be helpful]. Who in the military didn't see the red flags that should have prevented him joining the military police. He is now in a situation where people in authority are not just giving him permission but ordering him to abuse people "for their own good."
When people suggest "see a therapist," I bang my head. Look where this one survivor's "therapy" has encouraged him to go to "help people." Utterly terrifying.
It’s Hamlet the mini pig! More info about that guy here:
https://open.substack.com/pub/martiniambassador/p/hamlet-descends
I thought it was a guinea pig
You can almost see his thought processes as he descends. "Let's check to see which side is best to go down. Hmm, this one's on the (Hamlet's) right. Better check each one. Right...middle...middle...left...left... Wait, is this a new Konami code? Fuck it, middle all the way to victory!"
What a delightful first thing to see on the internet today! Thanks Martini.
Aaaaawww, I melted into a puddle from all the cuteness! He's so adorable!
O buon giorno Pigoletto! (“Don’t eat me, I’m too cute!”)
O Capicola! Let him go!
Pigaro!
Also be aware that pig feces closely resemble the human variety. I know that because in my last neighborhood there was two pigs that got walked and the walkers were not good neighbors...
Still better than chicken shit.
Drive through the lower Eastern Shore (Delmarva) during the summer - it's like nerve gas.
Actually, the hierarchy of shit is somewhat debatable. Pigshit is pretty nasty, as is that of the long pork. Chickenshit is mainly a problem because of the density in which chickens are raised--you get similarly potent concentrations in penguin rookeries and other nesting areas of sea birds. Snakeshit is pretty nasty, too. And people have been known to succumb to the fumes in when descending into bat caves. I also have it on good authority that Komodo Dragon shit is nasty.
The morale: Shit is like money--if distributed sufficiently widely and in the right concentrations it fosters growth. When concentrated, they both stink.
Money is like manure, it should be spread around (sic Hello Dolly) 😉
... but if you let it just pile up, it stinks.
Harry Truman said that once, and Bess was cornered at her garden club by a woman saying "Can't you get him to say 'fertilizer' instead of 'manure'?"
Bess replied, "You don't know how hard it was to get him to say manure."
But sheep shit is ok! (Hello Dolly!)
That is an amazing analogy. 😆
Amen to that!
The best neighbors live a minimum of 1/2 a mile away and only have indoor pigs.
Pretty much how I approach mealtime as well, but without all the SQUEEEEE!
Hamlet because of Danish bacon?
Alas poor young pig. I knew him, a rasher now.
This thread is making my day. Thank you, literate persons!
🤣🤣🤣
That is fucking CLEVER. I salute you, good Wonkateer.
It would make the cutest, teeny, tiny little ham
Farmer says, ''A pig that good, you don't eat him all at once.''
A hamlet, if you will
🥓
Local chapter splits from Moms for Liberty
https://www.standard-journal.com/news/local/article_c5ffe06d-494f-5ea9-b889-a1690c4a8037.html
Young Arnold! https://youtu.be/TuJproWiTWY
All the best to your Mom, Rebecca.
Why I hate insurance companies with a passion, part 103768: So, the youngest had a medical procedure last month, required us to drive 300 miles to get to a decent hospital and surgeon. It took a while to negotiate everything with insurance, and even after negotiations, they can apparently only approve hospitalization on a day-to-day basis. Before leaving, and on day one of hospitalization/day of surgery: Our surgeon and hospital is in-network, and our out-of-pocket max has been met: Insurance will cover everything at this point. We even have paperwork to that effect. Day 2: surgeon is in-network, hospitalization is out-of-network, but we are only responsible for $25K of the $75K that we now owe for using an out-of-network hospital (although, since this was transmitted via USPS, and we are out of town, we will not actually know any of this for another two weeks). Day 3: Why haven't you moved the patient to a different hospital, and why did you use that one (see previous sentence for when we will actually know any of this)? A month later, insurance company says that since they decided to switch the status from fully covered to out-of-network the day after the surgery, we owe at least $25K, maybe more, and that there is nothing that can be done. This is going to be a fun few days/weeks/months of arguing and submitting appeals and asking for external reviews and reporting Anthem Blue "World's Shittiest Insurance, But As Good As The Rest" Cross to the insurance commissioner and dreaming of ways in which insurance execs could be mulched.
TLDR: Fuck insurance companies, fuck insurance company executives.
I have no choice in insurance carriers through my pension plan. It's BC/BS or nothing, because nobody else wants to insure us outlanders. Well, they don't either, but they haven't found a way out yet.
Good luck.
We had an evangelical family home schooling down the street. They didn't abuse their kids. She was a lovely if somewhat buttoned up person, he got his jollies sexually molesting unconscious patients. It takes all kinds.
God, could Ken Paxton just fuck of to some island somewhere, and stop being the asshole in every situation during his entire life?
As if I hadn't had enough reason to distrust WaPo before. They bring up "rented home" like that proves the person was bad. I'm nearly 40, the only time I felt like I could afford a house was a fixer-upper. Even then I planning to rent out 1/2 - 2/3 of the house to pay the mortgage. Then they say the person "hesitated when officers showed up at her door" like that indicates guilt, I'm a straight-presenting white male and I hesitate when cops order me. Law enforcement takes any action or inaction to mean guilt and the courts go along with it, that alone is reason to pause.
ETA: I think unmonitored homeschooling is ripe for abuse. My parents and grandparents were educators and knew they couldn't properly homeschool me. Instead, they supplemented my education.
I'm just going to rant here for a minute, if you'll bear with me.
How do people do this Christmas thing and still maintain any sense of joy? For me it is just non-stop stress, and this year I am REALLY not feeling it at all. Tree, decor, cards, gifts, cookies, gatherings...For some reason this year I can't wrap my brain around it all, can't make a game plan, can't put an order to it.
I wrote a whole bunch more, but I deleted it, because really, who gives a shit? I hate this time of year. Just gotta slog through, I guess. But I am having real trouble faking that sense of joy.
Mandatory jollity! You will love it!
Glad I don't have anyone else here to pretend for. The cat doesn't care.
I find the Christmas thing to be quite simple: Don't decorate, accept that the cats are going to fuck up any tree, so don't get a tree, don't worry about gifts or anything like that, and just focus on maybe having a festive meal on December 24th for the family.
100% support you. It's capitalist/christian nonsense (no offense to christians) concocted to brainwash people to BUY ALL OF THE THINGS. Just ignore it, there's no inherent sense of joy. I'm an orphan and agnostic, so our Xmas is 2 presents for the 2 cats, 1 for me (book) and 3 for my best friend. New Years (the only good "holiday") will be here soon. Agnostic hugs
by not doing it. once our youngest turned 18 we stopped the present thing unless there was something they specifically needed. We dont have a tree and we get takeout for dinner
Simple answer - first, be an atheist or agnostic. Second, have few or no relatives.
Three, have people who tell you that you are a grinch, even as you point out you cannot be a grinxh because you don't believe in Xmas.
Fourth, tell others how you feel and don't apologise for it.
I was in NYC over the weekend and all sorts of things had been X-ised and boy was it SO obnoxious. Especially as it was pouing rain much of the time and no amount of fucking lights was going to make me any happier.
Finally, don't let big business take you for a ride. This is the U S of A, where MONEY is the ONLY THING, and the only Xmas cheer on December 25th will be that of the oligarchs and BIG BUSINESS smilaing that they put one over on the citizens once again in convincing people they MUST do cetain things.
YOU DO NOT HAVE TO
Take time for yourself. Let go of the little things and big if need be.
Smile and enjoy your life , friends and children/pets.
Let go of the materialistic, money driven part of the season... Or delegate, as office personnel say...
Does anyone know where Rebecca went on vacation? Because I want to go wherever that is.
i think it was the Virgin Islands
Thank you!
Rebecca, Thanks for the "poem to wash your heart" thing.
The story about Roman's life and death is haunting me. I experienced abuse and neglect that utterly destroyed my life but it wasn't a fraction of what was done to Roman. The part that is eating at me is the continued failure of adults with regard to the surviving children. Who in their right mind thinks that sending one of the survivors who participated in the abuse to join the military [would be helpful]. Who in the military didn't see the red flags that should have prevented him joining the military police. He is now in a situation where people in authority are not just giving him permission but ordering him to abuse people "for their own good."
When people suggest "see a therapist," I bang my head. Look where this one survivor's "therapy" has encouraged him to go to "help people." Utterly terrifying.
EDITED slightly, because I'm that kind of person.
Expect the horror to continue when he musters out of the military and becomes a cop.
Thank you for sharing your experience. I hope you are hanging in OK x
Where did you all go after you left Twitter? Tell me so I can find you!
bluesky. I have 3 codes. not everyone i followed on twitter is there so I do still have an account
Oh ok, I am just learning. Sure I'll take a code, however that works... if ya got any left, thanks!
bsky-social-nqsfb-g662q
Thank you!
If you want a bluesky code I got some.
Thank you, I think I got a code already. Looks promising. I am still learning.
Mastodon. Wonkette has a server there. Wonkodon dot com.
The goddess known as $5Feminist described the recent Musk scented legal tactic as "...this lawsuit-shaped stinkbomb"
$5Feminist content FTW!
There's always the Foreign Legion...
https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F21301aa0-4f0f-4333-9f95-667d904f3904_686x1000.jpeg