Chelsea Clinton Can't Bring In Old, Young Vote

While Hillary Clinton's youth and virility make the college kids swoon during campus visits, grumpy, senile daughter Chelsea Clinton -- the oldest person on earth -- doesn't possess her mom's hippie prowess. We have empirical evidence! A Wonkette "student" operative found Chelsea on the University of Nebraska campus today. "I think she was lost," the operative -- who is a total stitch -- says. Check out how she invigorated that very youthful demographic:

Where are her Clinton "politicking" skills? Hate to say it, but this dynasty might end after only one generation!