Chuck Grassley Lost A Limb At Antietam, And Sanjay Insists Anderson Cooper Has The Seven Signs Of The Aporkalypse
In the name of Her Majesty and the Continental Congress! According to some sort of 'Save Glenn Beck' online petition, Americans overwhelmingly choseWALMARTas the symbol of our great Union! Other popular symbols that didn't make the cut: a bald eagle clenching a Kenyan birth certificate with its razor-sharp talons,LYNNDIE ENGLANDpointing at at pyramid of nakedLOLCATS, and the piano box casket ...
FRESH GOSSIP-ON-THE-COB: Egad! Silver cuddlebearANDERSON COOPER has contracted theKANDAHAR KRUP! What is this Krup? A rare and elusive STD, sought after by venereal disease enthusiasts and big-game hunters? Or maybe Kandahar street lingo for fentanyl-laced heroin? Let's askDR. SANJAY... Loony IowanCHUCK GRASSLEYswears on his grandma's Twitter that he served four tours of duty as a young, dashing Zouave during theCIVIL WAR-- and he still has the grapeshot lodged in his anus to prove it ...FRED THOMPSON quotes a memorable line fromTOM CLANCY'Slatest international hostage crisis thriller ...
MICHELLE MALKINis horrified that millions of Americans worship BARACK OBAMAas the one true son of a Luo tribesman. Why are you sheeple so impressed that Obama can turn water intoKOOL-AID? Michelle will not break bread with you. She is not your neighbor.
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