Congresslady Thinks All Local Black Kids Not Related To Her Are Dumb

It is a Well-Known Truth that the average Little League team is coached by the Type-A, hyper-demanding, rage-filled daddy of one of its players. Typically, the other parents watch very carefully to make sure that Coach doesn't give Junior too many at-bats. Now take this scenario, and make it about black persons who inhabit Dallas, and make the coach Representative Eddie Bernice Johnson (D-TX), only we are talking College Scholarships and not Child Sports. Also, the "at-bats" are "scholarships from the Congressional Black Caucus Foundation." And there are no bats or balls and no Big League Chew and also no hot dogs. Got it? No? Perhaps the Dallas Morning News should try to explain it.

Longtime Dallas congresswoman Eddie Bernice Johnson has awarded thousands of dollars in college scholarships to four relatives and a top aide's two children since 2005, using foundation funds set aside for black lawmakers' causes.

The recipients were ineligible under anti-nepotism rules of the Congressional Black Caucus Foundation, which provided the money. And all of the awards violated a foundation requirement that scholarship winners live or study in a caucus member's district.

Oh, but whatever shall the gentlewoman from Dallas say to defend herself?

"Had there been more 'very worthy applicants in my district,' she added, 'then I probably wouldn't have given it' to the relatives."

Rough translation: "All black kids in Dallas are dumb, except for the ones related to me or my employees." Haha, that is probably not what she really meant. Last week she denied that she'd played favorites, but a couple days ago she released a statement saying that she had "unknowingly" violated the rules and would fix it, somehow, with monies. She added that no kid had received more than $1,200 each. Then again, this is Texas, where $1,200 can buy you a horse, a piece of land, and a clean woman.