Conservatives Can't Even Call Obama A Monkey Anymore, Unfair! Your Weekly Top Ten
Not a monkey either. That is a baby.
Oh good morning, Wonkers! It is Saturday, which means is time for your happy joyful list of the top ten posts of the week, aren't you excited about that? Pour yourself some coffee or Ovaltine or moonshine, whatever you like to drink in the mornings, and sit a spell!
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YOU CANNOT EVEN RIGHT NOW.
Shall we now count down the top 10 stories of the week, chosen as usual by Beyoncé, ALLEGEDLY? Yes we shall!
1. Colorado GOP lady just thought it would be hilarious to post a meme of Obama as a monkey, how is that racist?
2. For the second week in a row, poor Ryan Bundy just can't understand why he can't have his guns. In jail.
3. Surprise! Donald Trump was a horrible garbage monster to Marla Maples, can you even believe that?
4. This congresslady calling an ignorant bigot an "ignorant bigot" is just the best thing ever.
5. That POOR thin-skinned man-baby Donald Trump attempted to respond to Hillary's foreign policy speech. Sad!
6. Oops, Glenn Beck forgot to tell his guests it wasn't OK to call for Trump's assassination, and now Glenn Beck is suspended.
7. Donald Trump knows less about energy than Sarah Palin. Let that sink in for a minute.
8. It seems like maybe Donald Trump isn't actually good at business, is that even possible?
9. Oh look, last week's Deleted Comments: Our libraries are full of pedophiles and our schools are full of Jews!
10. And finally, know what Hillary Clinton is? A grown-ass woman. And know what Donald Trump is? A sniveling, wussy, unhinged man-baby. END OF STORY.
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Yeah, I hate to sound like a 15 year old but I do miss my friends. Mostly composed of people I otherwise already knew who had gravitated to the bay, I don't know anyone who ended up in Sacramento currently.
Like that Olympic torch he carried, Muhammad Ali burned brightly. He shed light on those he helped and heat on those he fought. What a great, great soul. RIP.