Dear Walnuts: Stop Saying 'My Friends'

In a heartfelt letter from one of the dozen or so American Youths following the primary, John McCain is politely asked to stop with this insane "My friends" shit, because it sort of draws attention to the fact that McCain is 112 years old.

It's suggested that McCain go even farther back in time and choose a chestnut such as "My fellow countrymen" because "it's so old it sounds new." Here are some other ideas:

* My bitches.

* My Mexicans.

* My father who art in Heaven.

* My humps.

* My Sharona.

* My Chemical Romance.

* My God, My God.

* My Space.

 Dear Sen. McCain [Election Geek]