Dear Moran: The Earth is flat and the sun is raised by a magical pony princess. P.S. I am not a crank So here's the biggest surprise about the cranky comments we got in response to our little story last week about Nazi Flat-Earthers, who are a thing and who almost drove the editor of the white nationalist website "Daily Stormer" crazy -- see, Flat-Earthers are good for something! -- but here is the surprise, for reals: We didn't get any angry comments from Nazis, as such (maybe one semi-Nazi, as we'll see). Instead, we heard from several very unhappy Flat-Earthers, who dropped by to do some Real Science to us and explain why only a brainwashed fool would think the Earth is an oblate spheroid. Fortunately, to help those of us who may be resistant to the incontrovertible truth, our first expert, "Simon Faulkner," posted in all-caps, lest we miss a single vital word: