163 Comments
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Rachel Book Harlot's avatar

Christ. What an asshole.

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Larry Schmitt's avatar

I'll give it a try. Thanks.

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John Thorstensen's avatar

I suppose that if the bomb is big enough, the fireball takes a few seconds to come up to full brightness. However, the small nukes that N. Korea has would go to full brightness in what would seem to be an instant. That's what happened to all those poor Japanese.

Here's hoping Mueller works fast and well.

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John Thorstensen's avatar

If you could do that, you could forsee your own end.

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Disgruntled Farmer Employee's avatar

Guam: The perfect getaway to kiss your ass goodbye or maybe MORE?https://media.giphy.com/med...

Duck and Cover

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Disgruntled Farmer Employee's avatar

Some have predicted it would happen sooner, actually...http://www.alternet.org/ele...

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Brian Bixby's avatar

Well, considering the quality of their guidance systems they'll probably aim directly at the island, hoping they'll manage to get within a thousand miles. Of course since their failure rate on launches is about 1 in 3 it's not like Guam has a lot to worry about, especially since the payload on the missiles is much lower than the actual weight of their nukes.

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Brian Bixby's avatar

My grandmother had a globe that showed 'French West Africa', Portuguese Southwest Africa, and 'Belgian Congo'. It wasn't much use in our geography homework.

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phoenix00's avatar

For all you travel and aviation geeks: our favorite airline United operates an island hopper from Honolulu to Guam, stopping at un-Trumpable US territories such as Kwajalein, Kosrae, Pohnpei, Majuro, and Chuuk.

https://www.youtube.com/wat...

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Viva La Tabula Raza's avatar

I was there 84-85 on USS White Plains. Loved the diving, Talafofo Falls, etc. Beach at the Navy base was pretty nice, but I liked the one at Anderson better, sitting at the foot of that big ass cliff. Too hot, humid, and buggy to ever consider living there full time, though. Hafa Adai!

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Olav_Pompatus's avatar

I think this should be the romantic island music theme song that accompanies the tourist promotion: https://youtu.be/15YgdrhrCM8

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H0mer0's avatar

Reminds me of when I had a roommate of Italian extraction and I always got better grades than her since her family taught her their dialect instead of Tuscan Italian.

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Wes's avatar

On the plus side, if WW3 was sparked and Guam was bombed, it would most certainly take care of their brown tree snake problem.

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Ill-Advised's avatar

In Arabia, silly!

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The Librarian's avatar

The Wall Street Journal article describing the Byers incident was titled "The Radium Water Worked Fine Until His Jaw Came Off"!!!!!!11!!!1!!!!

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The Librarian's avatar

Guam, Guam, Guam Please don't bomb Guam 🇬🇺!!

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