544 Comments
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Tessie's avatar

I'd be amazed if he even COULD poop, given where that poker is rammed.

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Zyxomma's avatar

Ta, Gary. Biden gave a great speech. Mikey No Likey looked like a toddler who needs to pee. Now.

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plecop's avatar

Wish you had included a shot from the beginning, when Biden launched into his speech without the customary introduction by the Speaker. Johnson’s expression was “Mommy, I was told I could speak in front of the grownups “. Priceless!

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Thomas Spence's avatar

I think he was getting notifications from his kid, over Johnson-Link ™.

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3FingerPete's avatar

Johnson remained mostly in his seat to maintain the illusion that he is tall.

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William Donnell's avatar

Johnson remained mostly in his pants, despite Boebert's driveby with a friend and a vicious penalty kick from Madge Taint Grün that overloaded his boner app.

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Daniel O'Riordan's avatar

Rumor has it that Clarence Thomas is always photographed seated because he's embarrassed by how short he is.

That amuses me.

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House of the Blue Lights's avatar

Finally, there is no example of Mike Johnson's o-face, because Mike Johnson has never had one.

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Daniel O'Riordan's avatar

Even his wet dreams are dry.

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Will's avatar

He's musing. If you fart during SOTU and no one smells it is actually smelly?

Yes, Skippy, it is smelly.

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SterWonk's avatar

> And yet weirdly, Johnson still doesn’t suck as badly as his predecessor, Kevin McCarthy.

That's an interesting topic of discussion! On the one hand, if McCarthy hadn't gone to Mar-a-Lago and given TFG a tongue-bath -- and thus given rank-and-file GOP Congresspeople permission to re-fly their MAGA flags -- TFG might have lost his support in Congress. On the other hand, Johnson was one of the architects of the lawyerly efforts to pull off the coup.

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SterWonk's avatar

> Biden promised to restore reproductive freedom to America’s tiny, minuscule, hardly-that-important female population

From several years ago, Chris Hardwick on Women's History Month: "Why not dedicate one-twelveth of the year to celebrating one-half of the population? That math checks out; trust me, I'm a man."

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Enter Ranting's avatar

Resting pussy-ass-bitch face.

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Owlftr13's avatar

This is nonsense!! All these pics of the SOTH are the same. That's the face you make when you fart and then aren't quite sure.

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dental floss tycoon's avatar

unsuccessfully choking off farts after a plate of refritos, sauerkraut, & hard boiled eggs 🥚 🥚 …

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Lionel “8647” Hutz's avatar

It will be interesting next year to see how Speaker George Santos responds to President Biden's next SOTU.

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Daniel O'Riordan's avatar

I imagine Speaker Jeffries will warmly welcome him to the dais.

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🕊️ ꕷꖹꕷꗍ ♌'s avatar

Someone here last night said Mike looked like he had swallowed a frog at one point.

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Lionel “8647” Hutz's avatar

A fairly large one, I take it.

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Daniel O'Riordan's avatar

The kind that don't take no shit from no one.

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Bagels of Doom's avatar

I liked the bit where Biden (who is A Old) eviscerated Marge.

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Daniel O'Riordan's avatar

The best comment I saw was, "She handed him the pin and kept the hand grenade."

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Mike Gesing's avatar

His donut pillow wasn't up to the task last night.

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Hamilton & The Crew's avatar

He has a hard time hiring good donut pillows. The good ones refuse to work for his ass. This is understandable.

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Daniel O'Riordan's avatar

Doesn't he pay his bills either?

Oh, that's right. He doesn't have a bank account, because those are the work of the devil.

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David Anderson's avatar

That’s “Mikey” (the little shitass)…

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