Economy Saved by EBay

Today Vice President Cheney reassured those concerned about the nation's unemployment rate, consumer spending and other economic milestones not to worry: traditional measures those who make money selling crap on eBay. "That's a source that didn't even exist 10 years ago," Cheney told an audience in Ohio. "Four hundred thousand people make some money trading on eBay."

It's true! We made five whole dollars off of an opened copy of the last Liz Phair record! And just think about how good the economic outlook would be if we included all the money people make off of bake sales and lemonade stands, not to mention Cheney's own home business selling "How To Survive A Post-Kerry Election Terrorist Attack" pamphlets. (Said Cheney, "One powerful little classified ad can make you a fortune!")

 Cheney: Economic Stats Miss EBay Sales [AP/Newsday]