Election Conspiracy Theorists Insist Dems Even Stole The Elections They Lost
We sure are terrible at stealing elections!
On Friday, Democrat Adam Frisch officially conceded to Lauren Boebert, who will now be annoying us all for at least another two years. The margin by which she won was small — coming down to a mere 551 votes — that it triggered an automatic recount, though Frisch felt that the odds of him winning the recount were so small that he would go ahead and concede early.
“The likelihood of this recount changing more than a handful of votes is very small.” Frisch said on Friday in a video posted to Facebook, adding that it would be "disingenuous and unethical" to give people false hope that he might win.
Frisch also criticized Democrats for having “eroded the trust of rural and working class Americans,” due to having "abandoned rural America and working class America for the last many years," which, boy, really would have pissed some people off if he were not a moderate.
As happy as the worst people in the world were over this news, many of them had been insisting the whole time that the reason the election was being drawn out so long was so that Democrats could steal it. This was, of course, not the case. It took longer because was a very tight race and therefore literally all of the ballots had to be counted before a winner could be declared.
It also was not very clear how they thought that dragging the race out by counting all of the ballots would give Democrats a chance to steal the election that they would not have had otherwise.
Still, this made things pretty darned awkward. So awkward that many of those who had been predicting that the Democrats would steal the election for Frisch had to come up with alternate theories as to how this could have happened.
QAnon influencer David Hayes, better known as "Praying Medic" suggested that the reason Frisch conceded was that "he might be afraid of what might be uncovered in a recount" (which by the way will happen anyway, by law, regardless of his concession).
Another genius on the Great Awakening message board suggested that she won so hard and got so many votes that those votes canceled out all of the fake votes that Democrats put in there.
this is why you vote to beat the cheat
She probably got 60%+ of the vote and they didn't have enough willing saboteurs on the ground to disable machines like they did in Arizona.
You can onlyfindharvest so many ballots before things are clearly illegal
Still another suggested that the election was held hostage until Republicans agreed to make Mitch McConnell (our choice!) speaker of the House.
This has nothing to do with vote totals or anything like it. Dems were going to run with the steal unless RINOs agreed to keep Trump out as speaker. current speaker was their choice and shortly after that news broke the Boebert gets the win.
Yes it's that corrupt and is why they don't stop stealing on either side. [somewhat edited for clarity]
To be fair, we do love ... Mitch McConnell. We love him so much that the evil election stealing Democrats said to ... somebody "Look, we'll pass on stealing this election from Lauren Boebert, if and only if you make our favorite person, Mitch McConnell, speaker of the House." That absolutely does seem like a real thing that would happen.
Another theory was that "The House is lost so they decide to not risk the cheat being caught," with that user declaring that Boebert should still "Demand the recount!"
They did not stop to ask themselves why Democrats lost the House if they are so very good at stealing elections, or why Boebert, Marjorie Taylor Greene and other objectively terrible people are still in office. Hell, why would they not put enough Democrats in the Senate to end or override the filibuster? Given that they are all such very deep thinkers and "researchers," that these things would occur to some of them.
Also if Democrats were stealing elections with the help of Italian hackers and their magic satellites or whatever, why did those same Italian hackers do absolutely nothing to prevent a literal fascist from being elected Prime Minister in Italy?
So many questions!
A very big part of the conservative worldview is that they are the vast, vast majority of people in this country (and elsewhere). They are the very "We the people" spoken of in the United States Constitution. They have been told for so long that they are the Real Americans and, therefore, it would be logistically absurd for them to not be the majority.
It's not surprising that as right-wing beliefs have become increasingly irrelevant, that as they increasingly lose social power (thus the cries over "cancel culture") and even, to some degree, even economic power (thus the cries over supposed "woke corporations") that the conspiracies they cling to have become increasingly ridiculous and impossible. Conspiracies develop because something happens that people cannot reconcile as being true, and the only alternative to that thing being true is a very stupid other thing that they made up themselves.
Election fraud conspiracies are popular for the same reason "All of the left-wing activists are actually just being paid by George Soros to pretend to be liberal!" was such a weirdly popular conspiracy theory for so many years (still waiting on my own Soros checks). It has to be true that the election was stolen for Joe Biden, it has to be true that any election that goes to the Democrats was stolen, because the only alternative to that is that they are not the majority of people in this country and that is something they cannot accept.
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The neighbor who got into it with Bobo and her exhibitionist husband's little trouser stain and called the cops must be very brave, foolhardy or have a death wish.That family could write the book on negative impulse control ... or at least an addendum to "The Palins: Alaska's First Family."
But his stage name is "John."