381 Comments
User's avatar
revenant's avatar

what do you want to bet he has a closet full of snappy black uniforms, gleaming leather jackboots and riding crops?

Expand full comment
revenant's avatar

and a nose so pointed he probably bores holes in the trees with it to get those delicious grubs he likes

Expand full comment
revenant's avatar

"Sharrup, Natash!"

Expand full comment
revenant's avatar

Putin is Fearless Leader andBoris Badenov

Expand full comment
revenant's avatar

tigers don't eat carrion. hyenas, on the other hand, dote on it

Expand full comment
revenant's avatar

so, "single anecdote"= epidemic. gotcha

Expand full comment
revenant's avatar

those look like hand grenades to me, and you might as well decorate your tree with explosive devices as with these things

Expand full comment
Incoming Ham's avatar

That boy may be the creepiest thing I have seen in a long time.

Full disclosure: I really really like blonds.

I draw the line at Hitler Youth.

Expand full comment
revenant's avatar

okay- you so smart, then tell us when jesus' beard was born?

Expand full comment
revenant's avatar

i don't care what the recipe says- every time i add creeping sharia to the batter, the cake turns out hard, dry and nasty-tasting

Expand full comment
revenant's avatar

it's like magic!

Expand full comment
revenant's avatar

so where do you go to find gluten-free Jesus?

Expand full comment
revenant's avatar

you see? we can compromise!

Expand full comment
revenant's avatar

really, thanks, but no thanks

Expand full comment
revenant's avatar

amazing that he knew not to mount the pointy end

Expand full comment
revenant's avatar

there seem to have been a few revisions to that whole "American dream" thing

Expand full comment