Everybody Hates Matt Gaetz And His Stupid Large Face
Finally, something we agree with DC Republicans about.
The truth comes out!
They're not talking on the record too much yet, but now that GOP Rep. Matt Gaetz has been exposed as a person who's
under federal investigation for sex trafficking minorsGETTING EXTORTED, Business Insider reports that all the Obamaphones and the iChats and the MySpace walls of all the Republicans in DC have been lighting up with everybody talking about how much they just hate that guy, hate him, hate his face, hate the day he was born, hate it when his large head blocks out the sun, HATE HIM HATE HIM HATE HIM.
Business Insider managed to find a couple people willing to defend Gaetz, but Wonkette, like a common Washington Republican apparently, hates Gaetz too, so we feel under no obligation to share both sides in this story.
It's people who worked in the Trump White House:
One former senior Trump White House aide was on multiple text chains with former colleagues gossiping about the deluge of news about Gaetz's legal predicament.
The former Trump aides aren't necessarily happy to see the three-term lawmaker in trouble, but they "feel a little vindicated," the former White House staffer told Insider. "He's the meanest person in politics."
Yes, we bet they just hate this very much for Matt Gaetz. No schadenfreude here or anyth-
"Good riddance," said another former Trump White House aide. "It sounds like he let whatever BS power he thought he had go to his head and he thought himself above the law."
It must be hard for Nestor to see people talking about his average American father like this.
Over there in Congress, it's not that much better, according to an "observer" who predicts House GOP leadership is just gonna stay out of this one while they "accidentally" watch the airlock close on Gaetz like HAL 9000.
"Republican leadership will likely watch him completely implode in a matter of days without having to do a thing," the observer told Insider.
It's not that they're not impressed with their fellow congressman's work, just kidding, it's definitely that.
"He's not in the legislative business. He's just out there to blow shit up and get on TV," one Republican US House staffer told Insider.
And it's not that they completely think Matt Gaetz is guilty of sex trafficking minors:
A former House GOP staffer heard from Republican leadership aides on Tuesday night who disputed the allegations against Gaetz.
"They didn't believe he would be that stupid," the former staffer told Insider.
Ha ha, says Wonkette, HA HA! Might we remind them of the original #PizzaGaetz incident, where Gaetz led a moron rebellion into a House SCIF, tweeting and ordering pizza the entire time? He's definitely that stupid.
But even that person, who erroneously thinks Gaetz is not that stupid, adds, "He's a blight on the conference." So!
Good thing Matt Gaetz didn't come to Congress to make friends. At least not with adults, ALLEGEDLY .
Let's see what the Republican strategists and consultants are saying:
"The congressman is one of those that came to Washington to make an impression for fame and fortune rather than accomplishing anything in Washington for his constituents," said a national Republican campaign consultant who plays in Florida politics.
"Matt is going to have a popularity problem now, and may just fade into obscurity. No one will want to associate with him until there's a resolution — which probably won't be favorable," the Republican consultant added.
Wow, just really no love for this guy. What a VERY SHOCK.
Let's close it out with some thoughts and prayers:
"I'm an Episcopal priest now," said Allison DeFoor, a former county sheriff and vice chair of the Florida GOP. "I will pray for him. That's all I can do."
It's all any of us can do, isn't it?
Bless his heart.
[ Business Insider ]
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