721 Comments
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Martini Glambassador's avatar

Tiny teacup puppy, way more alert in court, and less disruptive. Source:

https://open.substack.com/pub/martiniambassador/p/a-yorkie-pup-small-enough-to-fit

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Demme Fatale's avatar

Mwah that muzzle-puff!

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Monsieur Grumpe's avatar

You would need tweezers to clean up that pup's poop.

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OG Blockhead's avatar

I'm not clicking no 'puppy fucks cow' link

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Menotsure's avatar

There's nothing like a cup of pup in the morning to get one going.

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Thalia Is Not Amused's avatar

The best part of waking up

Is cocaine in your cup!

Or puppies. Puppies work, too.

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SkeptiKC's avatar

Immeasurably cuter, as well.

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Jeffery Campbell's avatar

And ever so much more reliable.

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SkeptiKC's avatar

At least the puppy is house trained.

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BosGrl's avatar

Please call puppy an Uber and send him to my house.

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SunMoonStars's avatar

My house is next.

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BECKY's avatar

Could we put him on a Greyhound?

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BosGrl's avatar

LOL!

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Babe Paley's avatar

That puppy baby seems so confused!

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Andrea's avatar

My dog friend Sasha might be one of these. She is very sweet but likes to bark at dogs that are 10 times her size

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Demme Fatale's avatar

My little Yorkie mix, Yogi, had a thing for big dogs.

He was absolutely besotted with this giant schnauzer boy that was at least 15 times his size.

He also loved a huge pit bull.

The big guys would lie down like sphinxes, while he "attacked" their front paws.

They didn't even open their mouths to play, and seemed to understand that he was a little guy that they needed to be careful with.

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Jen of Defense (War!)'s avatar

You did that one just for the click revenue, admit it

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Sojourner Truth's avatar

You would have preferred a photo of twice-impeached loser?

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Stroke1's avatar

Everything here is about chasing the almighty dollar anymore, all crass and commercial. Money money money. No one has any shame anymore. At least they aren't using the children this time.

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Shocktreatment's avatar

This is the subject of my newsletter, a weekly devoted to financial and spiritual health!

I'll give you the Friends and Family rate...

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Nancy Naive's avatar

How much were you paid to print that?

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Stroke1's avatar

30,000,000 times as much as I would have been paid for not posting anything.

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Nancy Naive's avatar

To quote the late great Don Rickles, “Here. Here’s your cookie.”

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Martini Glambassador's avatar

The quatloos are pouring in now, lemme tellya.

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Up Here in the Clouds's avatar

Don't spend them all in one place!

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Shocktreatment's avatar

Gonna go yacht shopping!

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SkeptiKC's avatar

Just don't harbor it anywhere near Manchin's tub.

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fair_n_hite_451's avatar

again?

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Jen of Defense (War!)'s avatar

I wager 4 quatloos on the newcomers!

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Marla's avatar

Marry Me Chicken is the absolute shizz.

That is all.

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BlueSpot's avatar

Beverly LaHaye had died? Put a bulb of garlic in its mouth and drive a wooden stake through its heart to be sure. Not saying its a vampire, but why take the chance?

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Darrell Leland's avatar

That was Peter Lorrie's comment about Bela Lugosi. I can think of a lot of folks who have or will soon die that need those precautions.

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The Blessed Reverend's avatar

RE Stronger Men - I have to confess I would LOVE to see the tank smash of the EV cars with Chuck N and heavy metal - that truly is Yow!

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The Blessed Reverend's avatar

Funny thing about CPAC and stronger men there is no shortage of Vegas hustlers and closet queens. I guess if you are trapped in a trad marriage these events are. your release valve. That sword swallower dude is also a stripper at the gay bars in Vegas - I thought he looked familiar

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Easterncedar's avatar

I was confused and disturbed by the Baptist Global News article, until I noticed it was authored by Rick Pidcock - so it’s all some weird porn prank, right?

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The Blessed Reverend's avatar

Well, only in the sense of What isn't a porn prank these days, really!

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Johnny Appleseed's avatar

Oh LORDY, from Politico (the Ketchup will start flying)

"The first six jurors have been selected for Donald Trump's New York hush money trial. The six individuals, who will decide whether Trump is guilty of falsifying business records to conceal a sex scandal, were sworn in after various other prospective jurors were removed from the pool this afternoon."

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Liminal's avatar

Whatever did happen to Robert E Lee? The woke mob has practically cancelled him from the list of national heroes, now why is that?

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Littorally Speaking's avatar

Maybe Merchan should ask *Barron* if he even wants the (biological, allegedly) dad who was screwing a porn star while mom was home caring for him after giving birth to be at his graduation?

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3FingerPete's avatar

Your tempting me with chicken will not convince me to subscribe to the NYT to see a recipe.

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Eos_explorer's avatar

I *strongly* recommend everyone read the Baptist News Global article. It's really good!

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Wookiee Monster's avatar

I love that MAGAts are already convinced that Trump is fuuuuuuuuuucked unless they push for jury nullification.

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Fiddlesticks's avatar

I would not normally read the Baptist Global News, but the analysis of the "weird right-wing Jesus drama" at the Stronger Men's conference was surprisingly progressive.

And he used the Barbie movie to reference patriarchy and why all the "Kens" were unhappy! Mojo Dojo casa house ftw.

Thanks Evan! Great link.

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Eos_explorer's avatar

Wasn't it? I was amazed!

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TakingAmes's avatar

“Never fight a pill, me boys… but it was too late.” Wow. Just. Gettysburg wow.

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Littorally Speaking's avatar

Apparently, Robert E. Lee was a cat owner. 😾

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AdmNaismith's avatar

The judge should allow Drumpf to go to Barron's graduation. It'll either be:

Torture for Drumpf to actually attemd the graduation

-or-

Sanctions for lying to The Court abt not attending

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Linoleum von Curmudgeon, Esq.'s avatar

First he started with the digital trading cards. Then he slid right into golden tennis shoes. Next he repackaged some printed-in-china bibles with some edited US Constitutions and stuck his name on it.

By the end of this week he'll be hawking his own Trump C-PAP machines and extolling the benefits of nap time with his C-PAP.

But my main question centers on how long will Wonkette take to get a AI rendering of him in court wearing the ugliest possible C-PAP headgear up and running?

Hours? Minutes? Seconds?

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