In 1789 Benjamin Franklin wrote a letter to Jean-Baptiste Leroy to brag that America had just finished its Constitution. Franklin was hopeful our new instruction manual would work, but ultimately concluded, "in this world nothing can be said to be certain, except death and taxes." While that idiom remained true for a couple hundred years, the 21st century has since bashed the old world to megabits and the only certainty we have now is that eventually we'll become trapped in some kind of Comcastic customer service hell hole of hold lines.