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Fire, Fury And Quite Frankly Kittens. You Need Kittens Right Now.
You can haz kitteh
Look, we've told you before, you probably don't need to worry too much about Donald Trump practicing his Basic North Korean Hyperbole For Dummies. Probably. Just because North Korea may actually have a nuclear weapon that could maybe fit atop one of its ICBMs, and Donald Trump is warning Kim Jong Whichever This One Is (he forgets) that any aggression will be "met with fire and fury like the world has never seen," doesn't mean the president is actually threatening a rain of fire on North Korea, which would be met, immediately, by the obliteration of Seoul -- by artillery, missiles, or other conventional weapons -- just 35 miles from the DMZ. As Friend of Wonkette Charlie Pierce notes, this is, after all, what America (or an electoral majority) voted for:
— Colin Jones (@colinjones) August 8, 2017
That's not just Fire and Fury, but also, frankly, power, which is even more powerfully powerful. Dude, gotta stop the repetition. Winston Churchill would only have said the Money Phrase once.
[wonkbar]<a href="https: //wonkette.substack.com/p/trump-reacts-to-scary-north-korea-nuke-news-by-bitch-tweeting-about-hillary"></a>[/wonkbar]Or maybe the North Koreans know Trump is full of shit, even when, Crom help us, he's talking about blowing up the world. You have to remember the possibility that he's stupid enough to really do something that would get out of control, but the odds are that he won't. Probably. It's not like the markets are panicking. They were too close to closing for the day to do more than drop precipitously.
Also, as everyone knows, the president is a big fan of HBO's "The Wire," which took Tom Waits's "Way Down in the Hole" as its theme song. That song, of course includes a line about Fire and Fury, so he almost certainly was just thinking about his favorite show:
Actually, never mind. "The Wire" was Obama's favorite show. (Also, shut up you haters, season two was NOT a pointless digression.)
Anyhow, just in case these are our last few hours on Earth, which they probably are not, have some kitty cats to help distract you from the inevitable shadow of nuclear-tipped doom!
These guys are sleeping just fine!
This kitty has taken up a safety position in a little basket:
Kitties also seek shelter in bowls and sinks. Not from nuclear fire, but from linearity:
Some have added stealth capability:
Really, don't worry. Haters gonna hate, Trump's gonna make fart noises with his face:
Drinking is, of course, an option. Wouldn't want the world to end with the Good Stuff still in the bottle:
Honestly, it's probably not a big deal. Just relax and watch it all unfold.
Remember, these kittens know what they're talking about:
Now take a deep breath and have an Open Thread. We'll see you in the morning, almost certainly.
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