494 Comments
User's avatar
Chris's avatar

Wait, I'm sorry. "[...] claiming that electric motors can never be used in boats, because if they sink everyone onboard would be electrocuted [...]" Is this a quote or otherwise accurate paraphrase?

Please tell me this was made up, because I cannot conceive of people who wouldn't question the hell out of that.

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thephantomcheese's avatar

Hey, this is the "windmills cause cancer" dude, OK? Where you have a brain, he has a hamster wheel

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Chris's avatar

Fair enough.

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Charles  Schlotter's avatar

What benighted companies actually advertised on this televised roofie?

Even at the rock-bottom reduced rate of more $$$,$$$ than most people will see in a year, it's a lousy deal.

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JCfromNC's avatar

Christie should have known his zinger was going to go flat when he got a smattering of boos with his opening of "I know you're watching, you can't help yourself."

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JR's avatar

Funnest moments - Pence sleepin' with a hot teacher, VR & NH arguing about drapes.

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Manic Pixel Dream Girl's avatar

I will never subject myself to the willful viewing of a Republican debate, even the clips seem mildly carcinogenic, but this write-up was fun! Poor Chris Christie, he must have been workshopping that little debate moment since the last one. I don’t need to see it to know how poorly it landed. You can pretend you’re as anti-Trump as a well-read 7 year-old all you want, buddy. We all remember your hostage video when you endorsed that gelatinous POS. No amount of attempted rebranding now can wash off that stink. Drop out and endorse Biden for the good of the country, then, maybe, we’ll talk.

And then there’s this shit?! “… an expedited death penalty that would sidestep the Constitution to execute perpetrators within a few months, which would apparently be better than keeping guns out of the hands of would be mass shooters.” How very Christian of Mike Pence! The Rube Goldbergian lengths these assholes will go to to avoid addressing the AK-47-shaped elephant in the room. It’s the guns! The fucking guns! It’s all the fucking guns! WT ever loving fuck?! Not even getting shot themselves like Steve Scalise will compel them to turn their back on their true lord and savior, the money and power seemingly bestowed by the foundation myth of a completely infallible second amendment. You can’t negotiate with terrorists. And the Jesus-y, sanctimonious hypocrite ones like Flyboy Pence are just the absolute worst. Vote. Them. Out. Vote the whole fucking party out. Talk about relegating to the dustbin of history. Useless fucks.

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Charles  Schlotter's avatar

Strange that Mike Pence is arguing for an expedited death penalty, considering how Trump's mob still wants to expedite him with a rope from a makeshift gallows.

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Manic Pixel Dream Girl's avatar

Good point! But then again, GOP self-awareness doesn’t play well in Peoria I suppose. It’s all “Rah! Rah! Guns! Rah! Rah! Kill! Kill! Feed the Christians to the lions!” Oops, wrong death cult. 🙄

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AboveTheGrayFog's avatar

Everyone in that debate seemed to be trying to riff o Trump for not being there. Unfortunately they also provided very good reasons for why NO ONE should be there at all.

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Charles  Schlotter's avatar

Their arguments not to be there were so persuasive that I wasn't there, my own self.

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TakingAmes's avatar

Such a missed opportunity for Christie. He should have said “Donald Ducking Trump.” Jiminy.

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Charles  Schlotter's avatar

That is probably how the speech writers wrote it but he blew the punch. Very Bill Maher of him.

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Bub the Displaced Zombie's avatar

I know lots of you don't want to click on X links, and I get that - but this is just so sweet. Make an exception. Trust me.

https://x.com/GoodNewsCorres1/status/1707457286296277303?s=20

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Charles  Schlotter's avatar

Nikki Haley sez: “Every time I hear you [Vivek Ramasawamy], I feel a little bit dumber for what you say.”

I am too much of a gentleman to deny that she sounds increasingly dumb but the correlation of her appearing alongside him does not imply causation.

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Secret Agent Super Dragon's avatar

Before they started did they have to identify whether they were auditioning for a job in Trump’s administration, a job at Fox News, or just in it for the grift?

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Colbert Thorenson's avatar

At least internally, I have had a lot of unrealistic hope riding on the over-hyped prospect of Chris Christie just donkey-stomping the living bejesus out of Simple Jack in a televised debate. And to be quite honest, he actually had me a little bit with that "look in the camera" nonsense. Right up to the point of "Donald Duck" JFC man, you actually hired people who thought that was the direction to go? I couldn't have been more disappointed with the ending if I were the lady in that Pina Colada song.

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Secret Agent Super Dragon's avatar

It makes me laugh that someone presented this to him as if it was going to be his big moment. “And then you call him Donald Duck, it’s gonna bring the house down!”

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Charles  Schlotter's avatar

Somehow, I am disappointed that my zero expectations were underfulfilled.

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Major Is My Spirit Animal's avatar

If you are poor then you probably only have 20 miles of range in your gas powered vehicle bc you can't afford to keep the tank full.

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You Should Ice That Burn's avatar

Electric boats? You mean Submarines you fucking dumbass? (PAB, not you Dok)

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Dexter Mathorphan's avatar

I thought after 15 seconds you were allowed to regain control of a Republican debate by firing a shotgun into the ceiling of the raygun library.

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Tosca's avatar

Adding guns to that mix would certainly simplify things.

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GrannysKnitting's avatar

if it wasn't a debate rule before it should be now

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DemoCat's avatar

These utterly pointless “debates” between unserious people vying for v.p. consideration have to be the dumbest expression of American politics ever.

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AlpacaDiddy's avatar

Agreed, I avoided it this time but I still got a little on me! An actual intelligent discussion of reality-based policy issues MIGHT seem reasonable just about now - and even required, but NOPE NOT GONNA DO IT - WOULD'NT BE PRUDENT AT THIS JUNCTURE - let's all squabble at once instead. Pathetic! Hence the phrase Babbling Idiots!

I found more important things to do like waxing the fish & vacuuming the cat!

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DemoCat's avatar

Yes, Mike Pence is a wise man offering “death penalty” tough guy talk as the answer to mass shootings. Because if there is anything a desperately angry and disturbed shooter holds dear, it’s their own love of life. If only shooters knew they might end up dead if they open fire in a public place, surely they’d choose a healthier way to express their rage.

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Secret Agent Super Dragon's avatar

I mean, none of these people are planning on getting out alive but sure, a death penalty will definitely deter then

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