Florida Bans Fluoride In Water, While RFK Jr.'s FDA Bans Some Fluoride Treatments, You Know, For Kids!
So long, teeth. It's been real.
We have some bad news for the state of Florida. As many know, your state is bedeviled by rising sea levels. Flooding is a normal part of your lives and will only become more so in the future. Your towns, your cities, your alligator-wrasslin' farms will all be covered in more water than you can imagine.
The good news is that at least state authorities won’t be putting any fluoride in all that water to turn you into communists. We can’t vouch for your dental hygiene, though.
Florida’s adenoidal insect larva of a governor, Ron DeSantis, on Thursday signed into law a bill that bans local authorities in the state from adding fluoride to their public water systems. The only people in the state who are happy about it are idiots and dentists. Unfortunately, there’s a lot more of the former than the latter in the state Legislature.
We suppose DeSantis at some point will also issue an official state apology to the John Birch Society, which any of its living members can excitedly read while gumming their dinner.
DeSantis called the fluoridation of water “forced medication,” saying that it violates “informed consent.” He also said the mineral has been proven to negatively impact pregnant women and children, inviting medical professionals, including Florida Surgeon General Joseph Ladapo, to talk about the mineral's side effects.
First of all, as we have written many times, Joseph Ladapo is a charlatan. If you’re taking health advice from him, you may want to consider upping your life insurance policy.
Second, the evidence that fluoride is bad for pregnant women is very limited. Robyn goes into it — at length! — here, which you should once again read and bookmark and send to all your Bobby Brainworms fans in your family.
There’s a real “throwing the baby out with the bathwater” feeling about this, but at least the bathwater isn’t fluoridated.
But okay, fine, all you whiners in Florida who don’t want your kids’ teeth rotting and falling out of your head before you turn 20. DeSantis said you can still add fluoride to the water in your house if you so desire. And doctors and dentists can still prescribe fluoride drops and tablets for kids who are at risk of dental decay. Which, given the high levels of sugar in the modern American diet, is all of them.
Wait, what’s that? The FDA has an announcement?
The Food and Drug Administration on Tuesday announced it will begin the process of pulling prescription fluoride drops and tablets for children off the market. [...]
FDA Commissioner Dr. Marty Makary said in a news release that he's instructing the agency's Center for Drug Evaluation and Research “to evaluate the evidence regarding the risks of systemic fluoride exposure from FDA-regulated pediatric ingestible fluoride prescription drug products to better inform parents and the medical community on this emerging area.”
It’s not emerging. We’ve had fluoride in our water for decades upon decades. There is copious evidence that it’s good for dental health. Also, the country is nowhere near going full communist. General Ripper had it wrong.
The New York Times notes that the CDC has called water fluoridation “one of the ‘10 greatest public health achievements of the 20th century.’” Somehow that page is still up on the CDC website. For now.
We were reminded of Robert F. Kennedy Jr.’s statement on Wednesday that no one should take medical advice from him. (Even though that’s KIND OF HIS ENTIRE FUCKING JOB.) RFK Jr. is also anti-fluoride and had promised during the campaign to ban it from public drinking water. But you heard what the man said to Congress. Parents who do not want to take his anti-fluoride advice are free to not take it!
But oh, sorry parents, RFK Jr.’s FDA is taking some of the easy fluoride treatments for kids off the market because he and his like-minded allies are total quacks. So it turns out that the Secretary of Health and Human Services is not really giving you the option of ignoring his advice.
In short, as with so much else, yes, the Republicans are giving you a choice, so long as you make their choice.
As of now, only Utah and Florida are banning the use of fluoride in public water. But given how goddamned insane this country has gone, there will most assuredly be others. And parents across the nation can stop worrying about the cost of braces and start worrying about how to explain dentures to the little rugrats.
Help keep Wonkette’s teeth clean and polished!
Make America England again!
(with apologies to my English friends, I know dental care there is top notch these days)
Fortunately, there are plenty of affordable dentists for everybody. Especially in rural areas. Right?